[lily.]

A bit of both Brona... she is really smart..

I'm sorry your mum doesn't get it. I don't know how I'd react if it were my daughter either. I have friends who have been through it though, so even though I don't entirely 'get it' since I haven't experienced it first hand.. I do get it to a point.. and I'd hope that if someone close to me felt they could confide in me that I'd be able to be there for them..

[Tom]

To be blunt, and call me heartless or whatever, but I just think its attention seeking

[lily.]

I don't think you are heartless. You are expressing your opinion.

I respectfully disagree with your opinion though.

In some cases it's attention seeking, but in others it's really not, so in my opinion it would be foolish to judge all cases the same.

[InOne]

Originally Posted by Tom

To be blunt, and call me heartless or whatever, but I just think its attention seeking

For some people I think, it becomes a coping mechanism, and then they get addicted to it. People have all sorts of reasons I guess. Would not say they were all attention seeking, some might try to hide it and feel ashamed.

[Iceman]

Originally Posted by Tom

To be blunt, and call me heartless or whatever, but I just think its attention seeking

No I dont think anyone would call you that. The fact is I did it for attention and some other reasons but it wasnt a cry for help as such, more of a look what im doing kind of thing....if that makes sense??

[lily.]

It's a complex issue to be honest, and to assume it's all attention seeking is akin to assuming every girl who cries rape is lying...

Just because a lot of them are doing it.. doesn't mean everyone is.. if you get my point.

[InOne]

Yes, very broad, and whilst everyones situation is different, sometimes alot of the factors can be quite similar.

[Wildcat!]

Originally Posted by Tom

To be blunt, and call me heartless or whatever, but I just think its attention seeking

NOthing wrong with that, because a lot of them are attention seeking, but in the form of a cry for help indirectly.
But also keep in mind that a lot of people who self harm, hide it from everyone. In those cases, sometimes, people never find out about it, until they have stopped doing it for a long time, before they ever talk about it. Or they get caught by accident. So those cases really cant be called attention seeking, since they are done secretly.

[Jack_]

Originally Posted by Tom

To be blunt, and call me heartless or whatever, but I just think its attention seeking

Didn't want to be the first to say it, but I agree with this.

[MrGaryy]

Originally Posted by sarah.y2j

Pretty personal thing to ask.

just cos you do it doesn't mean you have to reply if you don't want to.

[lily.]

Originally Posted by MrGaryy

just cos you do it doesn't mean you have to reply if you don't want to.

Oh, for a minute there, I thought I was in the masturbation thread..

[Deirdre]

I never have personally and I can't see how it would cross someone's mind to actually hurt themselves when they're feeling down, would be the last thing on my mind. But that's just my opinion.
I know a girl who was "emo" and she used to cut herself apparently, but personally I think she was a bit of an attention seeker because she didn't try to hide that she did it, she didn't deny it and apparently she showed people the scars.

[InOne]

That is the thing, people have been doing it long before this silly emo thing came along. All sorts of people cut themselves, does not matter how you dress or what music you listen to.

[Tom]

There was some girl at school who used to cut herself, and she used to put her blazer sleeves so you could JUST see the marks and would draw attention to that area, and pretend to hide the scars. hard to explain really but it was obvious she was showing off

Eventually she got excluded because a teacher cottoned on and told her to take her blazer off, she had slash marks all up her arms. She was an absolute nut job

Not judging them all by her though, thats just using one daft example.

[InOne]

I once read in a mag about a site that encourages it. And a girl had started doing it, and this other girl was telling to cut deeper, go all the way ect. Not nice.

[pinkmichk]

yes i have when i was in a very dark place it wasn a cry for help since people didnt know and wasnt for attention it purely a kind of release for myself at the time mine was linked with depression though

[Lauren]

Originally Posted by bronaaaa

I never thought of it like that..
Off topic - but do you learn things like this with your Physcology degree or are you just realllyyyy smart? :L

I'm not smart haha, I just have a natural knack for understanding feelings and possible thoughts behind things, it's why I decided to do a Psychology degree so I could fine tune it. Unfortunately it's my only talent

[Lauren]

Also about those saying it's attention seeking - not entirely wrong. I imagine a lot of the time it is attention seeking.

Either in two ways; simply wanting to have attention, be in the spotlight, be bothered about.
The second way is you want attention because you want help, you live within your own mind and by cutting yourself and possibly showing your wounds you're hoping someone will see it and understand your suffering, without any words spoken. It's a cry for understanding.

Then there's the people that don't do it for attention. The ones that do it to punish themselves. If something happens in their life, cutting themselves is a coping mechanism. If you're hurting physically then it numbs the emotional pain. Maybe you cut yourself to remind yourself you're still alive and still able to bleed - because your life feels so dull and lifeless. Maybe you're so self critical you give yourself targets and without achieving them you cut yourself, because you're negative schema in the brain tells you it's YOUR fault and it's the only way you can seek revenge.

Typically these people cut their legs so they're unseen, or they hide their scars. These are the people we never hear about, because either they get help, 'get over it' or simply manage to hide it.

[InOne]

Yeah, the people who do it because they are abused could do it so people fuss over them, to feel loved.

[Vicky.]

Yes, when I was younger. I used to cut myself nearly everyday. It made me feel kind of in control of my life after something bad happened to me.

As strange as that sounds

[30stone]

Hit a wall until my knuckles were all cut open and hand swelled up to like double its size..

Other than that no.

[Vicky.]

Originally Posted by 30stone

Hit a wall until my knuckles were all cut open and hand swelled up to like double its size..

Other than that no.

Do that quite a lot.

If someone pees me off, I tend to go outside and hit a wall instead of hitting them. Dont really like hurting people, but I have a very bad temper, so its one or the other really...usually the wall gets it

[InOne]

I wonder if there is links with that and Anorexia, with the being in control part.

[LemonJam]

When I was younger (13-15) I was pretty emo (but I had a fro instead of usual fringe, HOW EPIC IS THAT?)

I did used to cut myself down my arm. I'd have to wear long sleeve shirts all the time. The thing is I used to get so angry at myself it was almost relieving to be able to inflict that on myself as weird as that sounds.

This went on for 2 years then 2 of my close friends OD'd and were taken to hospital and I came to realisation, "What am I doing? Life is for living not for regrets." So with help from friends I picked myself back up again.

Now I'm a much happier person. Bad things happen, there's no way of escaping it, but there's more releases than moping to Drowning Pool candles in your room with a razorblade. My release is writing music now. Always appreciated it but never used it to calm myself until then.

That's my longest post ever LOL

[InOne]

Originally Posted by LemonJam

When I was younger (13-15) I was pretty emo (but I had a fro instead of usual fringe, HOW EPIC IS THAT?)

I did used to cut myself down my arm. I'd have to wear long sleeve shirts all the time. The thing is I used to get so angry at myself it was almost relieving to be able to inflict that on myself as weird as that sounds.

This went on for 2 years then 2 of my close friends OD'd and were taken to hospital and I came to realisation, "What am I doing? Life is for living not for regrets." So with help from friends I picked myself back up again.

Now I'm a much happier person. Bad things happen, there's no way of escaping it, but there's more releases than moping to Drowning Pool candles in your room with a razorblade. My release is writing music now. Always appreciated it but never used it to calm myself until then.

That's my longest post ever LOL

Yeah man, but it's not about being emo if you get me. I have a problem with the fact that people assume it's only 'deep' depressed emo teens who do it. All sorts of people do it, the Emos that people usually think of are middle class kids who are following the trend.