[Jarvio]

[QUOTE=qwerty8883;6340016]

Originally Posted by Jarvio

Ive been on computers since the Commodore+4 which i think has helped quite considerably. I find that i can be quite aggressive in my manner online which i find regrettable (after the initial posts i make on any website) but this is just dealt with by abstention of social interaction online until i have calmed down and taken stock of my own behaviour.

The most useful thing i find is to stay away from the mainstream websites and try to find likewise people which can be done easily with a bit of research.

One of the main reasons i watch BB is not because of the "love" of the show (infact most of the people on it annoy the crap out of me) but what i consider as fascinating social interactions and body language between the groups of people. My sister is a big fan, i always give my opinion on who is being false,manipulating or passively aggressive and im usually corrected by her on what she perceives is there ACTUAL feelings and reactions (5/10 times im right.......8/10 she is correct )

One thing i will say is that having this condition hasnt really stopped me leading a normal life. Ive served in the Armed forces, worked for a few major companies and got on with my life but periodically the cyclic breakdown will occur and they tend to get worse as times goes on.
Its a very useful show that has helped alot!

I'm glad to hear you're leading a normal life well, and I wish you well.
Unfortunately it's not the case with me at the moment - I still continue to struggle, even with jobs. People have not understood me in jobs, and I have often felt overwhelmed and confused at what has to be done, which leads me to either a) work carefully and slowly, which isn't good enough because the employer wants fast workers, or b) work faster and make no end of mistakes. The faster I work the more mistakes I make. That might be normal for most people, but with me it seems to be a huge case of it as I have had really harsh criticism from employers, despite trying my very hardest at the job

But, this was when I didn't have a diagnosis. Now that I do, hopefully employers will be more understanding and more helpful... but I don't know. I really hope so, because I sure as hell am struggling.

[Vanessa]

[QUOTE=Jarvio;6340031]

Originally Posted by qwerty8883

I'm glad to hear you're leading a normal life well, and I wish you well.
Unfortunately it's not the case with me at the moment - I still continue to struggle, even with jobs. People have not understood me in jobs, and I have often felt overwhelmed and confused at what has to be done, which leads me to either a) work carefully and slowly, which isn't good enough because the employer wants fast workers, or b) work faster and make no end of mistakes. The faster I work the more mistakes I make. That might be normal for most people, but with me it seems to be a huge case of it as I have had really harsh criticism from employers, despite trying my very hardest at the job

But, this was when I didn't have a diagnosis. Now that I do, hopefully employers will be more understanding and more helpful... but I don't know. I really hope so, because I sure as hell am struggling.

Awwww!

[Jarvio]

[QUOTE=Vanessa;6340033]

Originally Posted by Jarvio

Awwww!

Thankyou

I'd type the hug emoticon back, but don't know what it is

[DanaC]

[QUOTE=Jarvio;6340031]

Originally Posted by qwerty8883

I'm glad to hear you're leading a normal life well, and I wish you well.
Unfortunately it's not the case with me at the moment - I still continue to struggle, even with jobs. People have not understood me in jobs, and I have often felt overwhelmed and confused at what has to be done, which leads me to either a) work carefully and slowly, which isn't good enough because the employer wants fast workers, or b) work faster and make no end of mistakes. The faster I work the more mistakes I make. That might be normal for most people, but with me it seems to be a huge case of it as I have had really harsh criticism from employers, despite trying my very hardest at the job

But, this was when I didn't have a diagnosis. Now that I do, hopefully employers will be more understanding and more helpful... but I don't know. I really hope so, because I sure as hell am struggling.

God, that sounds really difficult to deal with. Must be so frustrating to try your hardest at something and get negative feedback for it.

[Jarvio]

[QUOTE=DanaC;6340036]

Originally Posted by Jarvio

God, that sounds really difficult to deal with. Must be so frustrating to try your hardest at something and get negative feedback for it.

Yeah it really is. I'm hoping that things will improve in the workplace now that I have a diagnosis. But at the same time I don't want to 'count my chickens'.

It's so hard to find a job these days, let alone the right job.

[kistar]

[QUOTE=Jarvio;6340046]

Originally Posted by DanaC

Yeah it really is. I'm hoping that things will improve in the workplace now that I have a diagnosis. But at the same time I don't want to 'count my chickens'.

It's so hard to find a job these days, let alone the right job.

Hi jarvio, I'm certain you will learn to deal with yourself as time goes on, my Father has Aspergers and is a very very successful man in life and especially in his career, I have some aspects of the condition which I have learned to love about myself so don't worry too much , just try and accept who you are , know who you are and why and if you can try and adapt to suit social situations, for example I eat the same thing every day, it doesn't change , however I worked out a meal I am happy eating if I go to a restaurant , so if I'm invited out I call the restaurant and ask if they can help me with that and they always can. You will work out strategies so you can deal with life I promise.

[qwerty8883]

[QUOTE=Jarvio;6340031]

Originally Posted by qwerty8883

I'm glad to hear you're leading a normal life well, and I wish you well.
Unfortunately it's not the case with me at the moment - I still continue to struggle, even with jobs. People have not understood me in jobs, and I have often felt overwhelmed and confused at what has to be done, which leads me to either a) work carefully and slowly, which isn't good enough because the employer wants fast workers, or b) work faster and make no end of mistakes. The faster I work the more mistakes I make. That might be normal for most people, but with me it seems to be a huge case of it as I have had really harsh criticism from employers, despite trying my very hardest at the job

But, this was when I didn't have a diagnosis. Now that I do, hopefully employers will be more understanding and more helpful... but I don't know. I really hope so, because I sure as hell am struggling.

Im not looking for compassion here but when i said i lead i normal life what i meant was that i have been treated in a normal manner all my life. The diagnosis was only made in the last year and this was due to an on going issue with "depression" when leaving the British Army. What as treated by many Army medical practitioners and civilian GP's as "depression" was in actual fact underlying Autism. My diagnostic process has been on going since april 2007 and its only in the last 6 months that they have confirmed what i knew in the back of my mind all of my life but thought was normal and how other people were.....They treated each symptom i had individually (anger,manic depression,anxiety,repetitive intrusive thoughts)

You said here about """" a) work carefully and slowly, which isn't good enough because the employer wants fast workers, or b) work faster and make no end of mistakes. The faster I work the more mistakes I make. """"

This is exactly the same as my own experiences. I tend not to work slowly as i feel this will be detrimental to how people will perceive me and will work at a pace that i think is acceptable to them. this obviously causes mistakes and slip ups which in turn causes your boss/peer to then "come down on you" which in turn AGAIN causes you to make a pre judgement about them and become very angry and annoyed with this persons lack of understanding when you feel you have tried so hard. I suspect normal people go through exactly this all the time but the effect on there psyche from the criticism for failure doesn't get taken in the same way.

As an example without going into to much detail the last time i had "depression" (which of course it wasnt) was when i was working for a team leader for a small company. I held a team meeting and felt i was undermind by a director of this company who came into the meeting and corrected my judgement on a matter i felt i was correct in. Within 2 weeks i had a depressive episode combined with anger which lead to me consuming myself over this tiny issue and it lead to me going sick and eventually leaving the job.......Over on tiny instance....

The latter is what causes the most issues in work. If you have the condition you will look at even the smallest criticism or even work banter as a direct assault on you. This will consume you and we will perceive there is no understanding and the job will fail.

The only reason i obtained a recent diagnosis was because this cyclic breakdown had happened so much that it was directly effecting how my life panned out and started to becoming the prominent issue.

If you are finding this happening to you all the time get help, Inform Occ Health in a working environment and also your GP/Psychiatric doctor. they will start to help to cater more towards your condition. If you dont have a diagnosis and you are self diagnosed get it confirmed.... it will help ten fold in the long term...

[Jarvio]

[QUOTE=qwerty8883;6340052]

Originally Posted by Jarvio

Im not looking for compassion here but when i said i lead i normal life what i meant was that i have been treated in a normal manner all my life. The diagnosis was only made in the last year and this was due to an on going issue with "depression" when leaving the British Army. What as treated by many Army medical practitioners and civilian GP's as "depression" was in actual fact underlying Autism. My diagnostic process has been on going since april 2007 and its only in the last 6 months that they have confirmed what i knew in the back of my mind all of my life but thought was normal and how other people were.....They treated each symptom i had individually (anger,manic depression,anxiety,repetitive intrusive thoughts)

You said here about """" a) work carefully and slowly, which isn't good enough because the employer wants fast workers, or b) work faster and make no end of mistakes. The faster I work the more mistakes I make. """"

This is exactly the same as my own experiences. I tend not to work slowly as i feel this will be detrimental to how people will perceive me and will work at a pace that i think is acceptable to them. this obviously causes mistakes and slip ups which in turn causes your boss/peer to then "come down on you" which in turn AGAIN causes you to make a pre judgement about them and become very angry and annoyed with this persons lack of understanding when you feel you have tried so hard. I suspect normal people go through exactly this all the time but the effect on there psyche from the criticism for failure doesn't get taken in the same way.

As an example without going into to much detail the last time i had "depression" (which of course it wasnt) was when i was working for a team leader for a small company. I held a team meeting and felt i was undermind by a director of this company who came into the meeting and corrected my judgement on a matter i felt i was correct in. Within 2 weeks i had a depressive episode combined with anger which lead to me consuming myself over this tiny issue and it lead to me going sick and eventually leaving the job.......Over on tiny instance....

The latter is what causes the most issues in work. If you have the condition you will look at even the smallest criticism or even work banter as a direct assault on you. This will consume you and we will perceive there is no understanding and the job will fail.

The only reason i obtained a recent diagnosis was because this cyclic breakdown had happened so much that it was directly effecting how my life panned out and started to becoming the prominent issue.

If you are finding this happening to you all the time get help, Inform Occ Health in a working environment and also your GP/Psychiatric doctor. they will start to help to cater more towards your condition. If you dont have a diagnosis and you are self diagnosed get it confirmed.... it will help ten fold in the long term...

Bolded part is so true.

And yes, I have an official diagnosis from a professional. So hopefully it will help somewhat...