[joeysteele]

Originally Posted by jet

Walking away and ignoring anger is not the best way to deal with it as the anger becomes bottled up. Sooner or later the person will explode, do something inappropriate or once again turn to drink or drugs to cope with destructive emotions.

A violent man who has beaten his wife, threatened to beat up someone inappropriately (as in the case of Linda's husband - what happened to the law dealing with theft?) and still uses violent words as a way to deal with situations can curb his instincts to use his fists and if so that is a good thing - but can that instinct really ever 'go away'? No - because Jim now uses passive - aggressiveness to deal with situations and that is a classic switch -over coping mechanism.

He could have taken Linda aside and asked for a quiet word. He could have asked her what the problem was in a non - angry, quiet way and listened to her answer without interrupting. She would have got it off her chest and he would feel good for doing the right thing.Then they could perhaps have been able to move on.

Walking away, ignoring her, sniping back at her and interrupting her (all classic passive - aggressive behaviour) only made the frustration in Linda worse and the vicious circle continued. There is only one way then it could have come to a head - Jim losing his cool and slipping up and that is indeed what happened.

Hi my friend jet, I don't say a great deal to you as to Jim as I know we are on totally opposite sides as to him in this CBB series.
My great respect for you yourself however remains 100% intact.

What I want to say here however is, I actually applaud Jim's walking away from full confrontation, it is something Lee does too I have noticed.
Speaking for myself, many times I have found myself in a situation where harsh words and a major argument could have likely blown up.

I choose in the main,to walk away and far from finding it bottling up, I find if I go out for a walk or take my Dog for a walk, after a short time things can seem very different.
On loads of occasions where I could have fallen out badly with someone,I have walked away, thought hard then came back,smiled and all is well.

After that,I find anyway, the original problem,or a great deal of it, starts to pale into insignificance.
So I do really applaud Jim for taking that action really,that's all I want to say.