[rubymoo]

"If only" is in the past, live in the present.

I believe we are all exactly where we should be at this precise moment, if i was meant to study harder at school i would have (that would be my if only!)

Here i am nearing 40 and studying at college, because i was meant to study at college nearing 40.

I was meant to skip school, drinking cheap cider at the bandstand.
I was meant to be obsessed with boys from a young age.
I was meant to be rebellious.