[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Shaun

I'd like to say yes but even I have a smidgen of... confusion whenever I hear about parents of murder victims forgiving the perpetrator(s). I don't know if I could ever do that... especially since it seems to come from a very Christian line of thinking, the idea that everyone deserves absolution or whatever.

The worst that's happened to me/my family, one of my cousins being (fatally) stabbed on a night out... I don't know. In that circumstance I don't even know who did it by name, but know that I am highly unlikely to ever 'forgive' him for it. I believe in rehabilitation and everything but I guess that doesn't allow for forgiveness and reconciliation.

Sorry I took this thread in a dark turn, lol.

...maybe the ‘Christian’ thing though is not feeling comfortable carrying a grudge or unforgiveness around through life because it’s something that doesn’t fit and sit easily with them and maybe starts to overtake and push out more positive things which someone wants to keep...take over, type of thing...?...so it’s more ‘forgiving’ for themselves and self preserving...rather than the other person ‘deserving’..?...

...all I know is when my son was attacked, which was many years ago...I couldn’t in any way wish any bad on the person who did it because for me, that would have meant wishing bad on his mother../..his family...so I guess ‘forgiveness’ is an essential to self preservation and could be seen as a ‘selfish quality’ also...