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Old 19-05-2011, 07:46 PM #1
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Newcastle

Suprisingly diverse and cosmopolitan city in the far north of England, also home of Viz comic which reflects the rich slang and drunkenness this city has bestowed.


Newcastle Brown ale was specially imported by Clint Eastwood due to the fact it's so awesome. And if it's good enough for cowboys, it's good enough for you.


The only decent people in England, if you ever have a party and want it to be bitching then you'll need to invite at least 2 scottish people, 2 newcastle people and 2 irish people and be sure to stock a lot of drink and a few towels to mop up the sick/blood out back

Last time I went out with my newcastle, scottish and irish frinds one of them fell asleep in a cupboard, I squared up to some dick who was giving me **** and we all got pished and were sick
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Old 19-05-2011, 08:10 PM #2
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Our ones are horrible

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Portsmouth is a small farming town in Hampshire. The locals dress like scarecrows, speak in a strange Romany-influenced rural dialect, and are known as worzels or carrot crunchers.

Portsmouth is where the carrot-crunching worzels live, oohhh arrrhh.
Quote:
The biggest ****hole in the UK. Full of Skate and the place smells of nats piss and fish (Grimbsy pales into comparison compared to Port****hole).

Relative pawpers in terms of a football team compared to their superior counter parts along the coast. Common sense though will soon prevail and the team of foreign refugee's will be relegated back down where they belong.
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Old 19-05-2011, 09:16 PM #3
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Colchester 44 up, 3 down

buy colchester mugs, tshirts and magnets
The oldest recorded town in England.
The Roman Wall in Colchester needs urgent funding.


HOW BORING IS THAT
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Old 20-05-2011, 12:01 AM #4
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Quote:
1.Greystones

Small, seaside town in County Wicklow. Well known to house less thieving scumbags than surrounding areas. Thank God.

Greystones is the ****ing ****.
I didn't think they'd have my town at all! That's the only one.
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Old 31-05-2011, 12:02 PM #5
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Makes Compton look like Disney Land.
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Old 01-06-2011, 08:37 AM #6
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St. Albans

a proper ghetto town in hertfordshire wid drive-bys and ****, der is turf wars and everything.

STA

Nickname for the rural village of st albans, near London.

The agricultural people of this minor village call it STA for short.
Do not trespass on their land. THEY WILL SHOOT YOU and chase you down in their horse and cart, except for at night, where they cant see because they have not been supplied with the blessing of electricity.
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Old 01-06-2011, 08:37 AM #7
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Most probably something about being inbred on a farm by the seaside
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Old 01-06-2011, 08:38 AM #8
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Lowestoft: the most easterly point in Britain.

Otherwise known as: **** town or LoweFAIL

A scummy seaside town that was big back in the day (and when i say that, i mean 1890) LOL. The town centre is a breeding ground for the local chavs and teenage mothers and as you venture out into the depths of north and south lowestoft, you hit the little crime-filled ****holes that are the 'Whitton' estate and Hollingsowrth Road estate. The main 3 High Schools; Bejamin Britten, Denes and Kirkley have all recieved tremendously low marks in Ofsted reports. The local 'nightlife' can only be described as 'bleak' - Notleys & 'HushHush' are filled with underage boys and girls with only one thing on their mind. I would advise anyone NOT to visit this place, unless you are incredibly low on funds or have nowhere better to go. seriously.
whats that place thats really bad?
"oh thats lowestoft?"



Nice.
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Old 01-06-2011, 09:01 AM #9
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Pfft.. most of this is obviously written by tinky Falkirk fans.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/iphon...rm=dunfermline
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Old 06-02-2012, 10:35 AM #10
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bumping this

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st.Helens may be one of the biggest **** holes in england holding the highest, incest, stabbing, murder rate, but ask yourselves wot is your towns claim 2 fame. At least our glass has the class and our rugby team is one of the best eva. You wish you lived here. You havent lived unless youve bin st.helens.
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Old 06-02-2012, 10:49 AM #11
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Haywards Heath
The place to be in mid sussex. Full of gypsies and battys.
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Old 06-02-2012, 11:37 AM #12
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Limerick

Quote:
Nickname: Stab City, given to it by Dubliners.

County in Ireland. Has an extremely bad reputation because of crime rates. You'd have to be 8 ft tall and 22stone armed with knives and guns to walk around the Southill area after 9.00pm.
Don't leave your car outside your back at ANY hour in the Southill area, as it will surely be stolen.

But is Limerick the worst place to live in Ireland? I DON'T think so.

Why? Because, besides the MANY, many SCUM that live there it's also filled with friendly, up for a laugh people, who could drink you under the table and bring you to the best house party ever. End of!

Limerick: The only place I've ever had a love/hate relationship with.
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Old 06-02-2012, 11:43 AM #13
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Limerick
hahahahaha
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Old 06-02-2012, 11:55 AM #14
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Fairwater

Suburban ghetto of Cardiff, Wales.
Currently in gang warfare with Ely, a neighbouring suburb.
I went to a friends house in Fairwater once. I noticed a BIG difference to my homeplace, Pontcanna.

Love the fact its not even in cardiff
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Old 06-02-2012, 12:04 PM #15
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trust me you dont wanna know...bit unfair really
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Old 06-02-2012, 12:12 PM #16
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Stockport

Stockport may be a ****hole but were ****in better than blackpool and as for liverpool well its full of ****in scouse bastards the twatting tramps. if any of you scuffy fat headed annoyin ****in bell ends ever abuse stockport again im gonna rape your nanna suck a fat one u bastard scousers.

scruffy scouse bastards

I feel so proud
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Old 06-02-2012, 12:15 PM #17
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St Helens 43 up, 32 down
A small town in the North-West of England. Formerly part of the County of Lancashire, St Helens is now unfortunately part of Merseyside, although remains a quality town. St Helens is heavily criticised by their neighbouring city of Liverpool who remain bitter and obnoxious and only love their own people. Although St Helens is small, there is plenty to do and this attracts people from all over the North-West and further for the excuisite cuisine, quality nightlife and superb shopping. St Helens happens to be the Capital of the World for Glass-Making, aswell as the home of arguably the best Rugby League team in the World, St Helens RLFC. Although many (Widnesians, Warringtons and Wiganers) are quick to make negative comments about St Helens, they must ask themselves what their towns are good for; nothing. They all want to live in St Helens; the home of class.
Scouser1: "****en hate St Helens me Lird!"
Scouser2: "Ahh yeah me to mateee!"
Scouser1: "****en WOOLS! Doin' anyt'n tonight mate?"
Scouser2: "Goin St Helens mate."
Scouser1: "Yeah me too mate."

This is a more flattering version, I found it quite funny. Scott will confirm that St Helens nightlife and shopping is not at like it's portrayed above. I never go into town for a drink, you'd be lucky to come home alive, there's always a kick off, local pubs are much nicer and do great food. Best is the Millhouse, just down the road from me, know the landlords well, and it's very warm and friendly. As for shopping, ha. It's mostly Mobile phone outlets, card shops, charity shops, pound shops and a small M&S, WhSmiths. Woollies has become a 99p store and TGHughes is boarded up. You need to go to Liverpool, Warrington or Manchester's Trafford centre for clothes shopping, it's rubbish here.
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Old 06-02-2012, 12:19 PM #18
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omg kate my aunt always goes in the millhouse

well she did until she was banned do you know her shes called evelyn

edit: deleted surname incase any staceys try to track her down on fb

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Old 06-02-2012, 01:00 PM #19
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Belfast

Capital of " norn iron " very sectarian but it rocks. The walls of the police buildings are 20 feet high with spikes around the top and they drive around in big tanks, the peelers that is. The walls are covered in murals and the people talk their own verson of english. Very poor politiians. Is split into north, south, east and west belfast.Oh yeh and it is the natural habitat for spides and millies.
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Old 06-02-2012, 02:52 PM #20
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Quote:
Fayetteville
A ****hole town in Georgia with nothing to do. I like to call it "Fayettevile".
Guy1: Wanna do something?
Guy2:Like what?
Guy1: we could go to Fayetteville.
Guy2: **** NO! They ain't got **** to do!
Quote:
fayetteville
ghetto city in metro atlanta
dont **** around in fayetteville my *****
omg
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Old 06-02-2012, 02:57 PM #21
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Tottenham
The most GRIM part of north london
Where the youth shoot for fun
And the Police have no power against the goons that run the streets.
Known for SHO SHO
TOTNARM
T
T-TOWN
n17 - n15
Dnt f..k with them Tottenham Man ull get rinsed/burst/snubbed/duppied/bodied. etc.

------------------------------


So misunderstood
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Old 06-02-2012, 02:57 PM #22
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fayetteville HAHAHAHAHA OMG


AHAHHAA

AHAH
AHAHAHHAHA
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Old 06-02-2012, 03:15 PM #23
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fayetteville HAHAHAHAHA OMG


AHAHHAA

AHAH
AHAHAHHAHA
i don't get it.
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Old 06-02-2012, 03:18 PM #24
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Doesn't have anything for the town I live in, so I'll just do Liverpool

Liverpool 567 up, 256 down
City in merseyside, north west of england. Great city, lots of things to do. Great nightlife.
'liverpool is great'

Pretty accurate
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Old 06-02-2012, 03:18 PM #25
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apparently where i live in leeds is full of chavs and bellends well im not a chav, so i must be a...
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