[Kazanne]

I am quite cautious of most people now,I never used to be but have been let down so many times with people I initially thought were friendly and ok that now I hold back a bit and probably do judge them unfairly sometimes, I try not to judge people straight away , but that first impression is crucial, but sometimes people who I thought were awful turn out to be nice and vice versa , there are just some people that you get bad vibes from straight away so I tend to avoid those.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Cherie

same, I wrote Mr C off as a bit of fluff when I first met him

aww

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...yeah I would say similar...although I wouldn’t say that I was a bad or a good judge of character, I don’t believe that any of us have any better first instincts ...but I do believe that any judgements on first instincts can actually be a barrier to seeing a ‘whole person’...we will always think we are ‘right and have good instincts’ because we’re only connecting with specific aspects of people that fit that, if that makes sense...?...waiting without judgement is the best mindset because everyone is flawed, we need to be open to seeing those flaws before we know whether we connect...

I've definitely in the past met people and thought "there's something I don't like about him/her" and it turns out they were the nicest people and on the other side I've really took to people and turned out they were assholes

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Livia

In my opinion you never get a second chance to make a first impression and I tend to decide in the first few minutes whether I'm going to like someone or not. I'm not going to claim I'm always right... but usually I am.

I'm the same BUT I wouldn't say for me that that's about someone being a "good or bad" person, that's just about clash of personalities. There are plenty of really good-hearted people out there who I know I'm not going to like, and don't like, based on their manner. e.g. I'm not a fan of people who are too loud or over-familiar, it does my head in, but they can be good people. At the same time, there are some absolutely ****ing awful people who I find hilarious .

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

on the other side I've really took to people and turned out they were assholes

Ahh there's nothing worse than feeling positively about someone and then all of a sudden they casually come out with something unforgivably sectarian/sexist/racist/homophobic and start chuckling away. Used to happen all the time with customers.

"Oh yeah, little Billy! Lovely chap, wouldn't say boo to a goose, so friendly..."
*from down the shop, Billy starts singing about killing Catholics*
"Oh ffs."

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

Ahh there's nothing worse than feeling positively about someone and then all of a sudden they casually come out with something unforgivably sectarian/sexist/racist/homophobic and start chuckling away. Used to happen all the time with customers.

"Oh yeah, little Billy! Lovely chap, wouldn't say boo to a goose, so friendly..."
*from down the shop, Billy starts singing about killing Catholics*
"Oh ffs."

It's happened a few times, more that I thought people were nice but they were actually quite manipulative and I want to say fake but I don't even know if they were being fake, they could just switch really fast, if you know what I mean? (I'm thinking about a person irl here so don't want to go into too much detail) but have had a few similar type things with people like this irl

[Livia]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

I'm the same BUT I wouldn't say for me that that's about someone being a "good or bad" person, that's just about clash of personalities. There are plenty of really good-hearted people out there who I know I'm not going to like, and don't like, based on their manner. e.g. I'm not a fan of people who are too loud or over-familiar, it does my head in, but they can be good people. At the same time, there are some absolutely ****ing awful people who I find hilarious .

I never said I can tell good people from bad, only whether I would want anything further to do with them. Of course, in a work scenario I have to strive to get on with everyone which isn't always easy but makes for a less stressful environment. I find some people who are very yielding and accommodating are that way because they are disingenuous. I don't like loud and over-familiar people either, particularly people who want to hug or kiss me when we first meet. I like strangers to keep out of my personal space apart from maybe a firm handshake. And yeah, there are some awful people I find hilarious, but I'm never going to lunch with them or ask them over for the weekend.

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by WickedSkengMan

No never

Meghan Markle begs to differ.

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

It's happened a few times, more that I thought people were nice but they were actually quite manipulative and I want to say fake but I don't even know if they were being fake, they could just switch really fast, if you know what I mean? (I'm thinking about a person irl here so don't want to go into too much detail) but have had a few similar type things with people like this irl

It's ok Niamh, I doubt your mother-in-law will read this.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

It's ok Niamh, I doubt your mother-in-law will read this.

aww I don't have a mother in law, I never met her, she died when Gav was a teenager

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

aww I don't have a mother in law, I never met her, she died when Gav was a teenager

Now I feel terrible.

[Ammi]

......(..I’m sure that she would have judged you wonderfully, had she known you..)...

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

Now I feel terrible.

...just pull the brim of your hat down over your eyes..no one noticed anything, anyway...

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by Ammi

......(..I’m sure that she would have judged you wonderfully, had she known you..)...

She's looking down on her thinking "Damn would've loved to made that girl's life a living hell!!! "

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

Now I feel terrible.

Don't feel terrible. Although it was awful, she was killed in a car accident by a drunk priest driving down the wrong side of the road.........didn't even get his licence taken off him, he went on to hit someone else (although luckily they didn't die)

Originally Posted by Ammi

......(..I’m sure that she would have judged you wonderfully, had she known you..)...

aww thanks. Apparently Gavs sister and her were very alike and I adore her so i like to think we'd have gotten on well

[Ammi]

.....you’re a looney, Marsh...(..a lovely one with size 12 feet......)..

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...just pull the brim of your hat down over your eyes..no one noticed anything, anyway...

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Don't feel terrible. Although it was awful, she was killed in a car accident by a drunk priest driving down the wrong side of the road.........didn't even get his licence taken off him, he went on to hit someone else (although luckily they didn't die)

Omg that's awful.

Originally Posted by Ammi

.....you’re a looney, Marsh...(..a lovely one with size 12 feet......)..

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Don't feel terrible. Although it was awful, she was killed in a car accident by a drunk priest driving down the wrong side of the road.........didn't even get his licence taken off him, he went on to hit someone else (although luckily they didn't die)



aww thanks. Apparently Gavs sister and her were very alike and I adore her so i like to think we'd have gotten on well

...a friend of mine, her dad is terminally ill...she lost her mother in law to cancer only last Christmas...anyways, both of their dream/hope was to see her daughter’s graduation...which was a few weeks ago...her dad managed to see it, a huge highlight for him and for his granddaughter...all of the pics are so emotional.....(...it’s something that was very much on my mind as well, things I wanted to be part of and didn’t know if that would happen...)...I’m sure sh would have loved to see the lady he chose to spend his life with and be part of his wedding day...but he had her for the time that he did and I’m sure that she loved her children very much and is still a part of who he is...

[Marsh.]

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...a friend of mine, her dad is terminally ill...she lost her mother in law to cancer only last Christmas...anyways, both of their dream/hope was to see her daughter’s graduation...which was a few weeks ago...her dad managed to see it, a huge highlight for him and for his granddaughter...all of the pics are so emotional.....(...it’s something that was very much on my mind as well, things I wanted to be part of and didn’t know if that would happen...)...I’m sure sh would have loved to see the lady he chose to spend his life with and be part of his wedding day...but he had her for the time that he did and I’m sure that she loved her children very much and is still a part of who he is...

Yeah, as a parent, I think that's always what you would think about if you were sick, things you would miss out on to do with your kids/grandkids. That's what I always think about aswell when i think about Gavs mom, especially because Luke is a similar-ish age now to what Gav was when she died. So glad you got through it too Ammi (selfishly for us here though )

[Beso]

Sending friendly hugs to you all.