[ChristmasNeeve]

Originally Posted by Redway

Yup. 6”4 is just about passable in the normal world. 6”5 and beyond is just astronomical for no reason. Giants tend to scare people with their height. What I’ve also noticed is that men who are more well-rounded height-wise and closer to average but still on the taller side (5”9, perhaps also 5”8 at a push, to 5”11) are more likely to have beards and deeper voices. What they lack in excess height that draws shallow women to guys (i.e., just by virtue of being 6”+) tend to be more strongly endowed in masculinity in other realms. You can’t always have it both ways.

Shallow women? Bloody hell.

[Urban Cragou]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Shallow women? Bloody hell.

I’m talking about that particular type of woman who would refuse to date/get romantically involved with a guy/man just because of him being less than 6 feet tall. I’m not talking about all or even the majority of women.

[ChristmasNeeve]

Originally Posted by Redway

I’m talking about that particular type of woman who would refuse to date/get romantically involved with a guy/man just because of him being less than 6 feet tall. I’m not talking about all or even the majority of women.

There's plenty of people, male and female, who don't get romantically involved with men/women for a myriad of reasons, be it physical or personality traits. Guess what? All of those reasons are perfectly valid when you're looking for a romantic partner because it's the most personal decision you will ever make in life, no one else has a say, the end.

[Urban Cragou]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

There's plenty of people, male and female, who don't get romantically involved with men/women for a myriad of reasons, be it physical or personality traits. Guess what? All of those reasons are perfectly valid when you're looking for a romantic partner because it's the most personal decision you will ever make in life, no one else has a say, the end.

I get that but women (mostly younger ones) who are 'petty' about men's heights go straight through me. I'm a decent 5"10 so I'm not personally too bothered but the way some young women (and guys) go on you'd think being 6-feet tall was more physically masculine than having a beard/muzzie, deep-ish voice or being quite built (not that I'm putting people into stereotypical boxes based on a few random external characteristics; I'm just regurgitating what other people sadly think) and that it's the norm for a man/guy. It isn't. Only about 10% of the male population worldwide is 6 feet or above. It's actually far more normal for a man to be 5"8 than 6 feet. There aren't a lot of benefits to being a wannabe-giant if you're not shooting hoops into baskets for a living.

[Urban Cragou]

If anything it's disproportionate and puts people at a higher risk of cardiac issues, because it deviates from the norm in many ways. Unless these young people have a thing for basketball players, a decent 5"9 is enough. That one will do. Any more than 6"3 just ... it just. Ya.

[Candy Annie Cane]

I wasn't bullied - there wasn't a lot of bullying at my school really. I went to a Grammar school (on a free scholarship) and there were a lot of wealthy girls who would try and demean the less wealthy girls but I wouldn't class it as bullying. Plus the less wealthy girls tended to more street wise and harder so would have knocked them into next week if it was too malicious

[ChristmasNeeve]

Originally Posted by Redway

I get that but women (mostly younger ones) who are 'petty' about men's heights go straight through me. I'm a decent 5"10 so I'm not personally too bothered but the way some young women (and guys) go on you'd think being 6-feet tall was more physically masculine than having a beard/muzzie, deep-ish voice or being quite built (not that I'm putting people into stereotypical boxes based on a few random external characteristics; I'm just regurgitating what other people sadly think) and that it's the norm for a man/guy. It isn't. Only about 10% of the male population worldwide is 6 feet or above. It's actually far more normal for a man to be 5"8 than 6 feet. There aren't a lot of benefits to being a wannabe-giant if you're not shooting hoops into baskets for a living.

You're always generalising people Redway, if what you were saying was true then going by your statistics 90% of men would be single because of their height.

Gav is only 5'8" by the way and he's just perfect to me

[Urban Cragou]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

You're always generalising people Redway, if what you were saying was true then going by your statistics 90% of men would be single because of their height.

Gav is only 5'8" by the way and he's just perfect to me

Yeah but to a lot of people a strong 5"10 is 6-foot. I'm not saying that all or even the vast majority of young women are desperate to have a guy that's the devil's number in feet-height (6) but surely you do sort of know that a lot of people get hung up on it in a shallow way that goes beyond just having certain preferences (which is fine). But I'm not talking about all or even the vast majority of ones. Just the ones who are noisy about their height preferences (which when they're so exaggerated and not exactly based on anything that's true do strike me as shallow).

And 5"8 is just enough. I'm definitely not arguing against that. That's essentially what I'm saying, even.

[Candy Annie Cane]

But what about the shallow men who want big boobs, blondes or brunettes etc etc? Surely its just personal preferences like anything when it comes to physical attraction

I've never met anyone who was that hung up on height?!

[Urban Cragou]

Originally Posted by AnnieK

But what about the shallow men who want big boobs, blondes or brunettes etc etc? Surely its just personal preferences like anything when it comes to physical attraction

I've never met anyone who was that hung up on height?!

Men who objectify women are a different kind of shallow (to say the least) but at least things like "brunette" are valid preferences. This business of guys being 6-feet is something that's often been hugely blown out of proportion in certain groups and it's guys as well as young women (and in both cases I'm only talking about a certain amount of them, not all or even necessarily even the slightest majority). And in that conglomerate I'm talking about guys who are overly tall (more than 6"3 especially) more or less seriously teasing their male mates who are actually of normal height for being "short" when they might-well be tall-average, for daring to be less than 6 feet tall (which is far from the default height for a man worldwide).

[user104658]

Redway what if I'm 6'2, well built, rock a beard AND have a deep voice? Prime beef and still TiBB's biggest feminist

In all seriousness though, I've always been tall and in MY experience, it's men themselves who have issues regarding their height/other men's height -- not women. The same goes for being "ripped". I think on a genuine psychological level, most people who are attracted to men/masculine features like some size/muscle BUT the over-the-top muscle definition is 100% to impress other blokes ... vast majority of women are not that fussed or even dislike it.

But isn't that usually the way, and that's not just men, women too are often the harshest critics of their own/other women's bodies and notice things as negatives that men don't actually care about at all.

It's all just socialisation none of it particularly comes into the real psychology of attraction at all.

Also -- a lot of it is what people prefer when looking at people on a screen. Massive under-estimation of the effects of both personality and, as we are all just animals at the end of the day, pheromones when it comes to real world attraction.

[user104658]

I was also going to say I've never teased anyone for being short but ... at Uni there were 4 of us in a house, 3 of us were over 6' and one 5'7. And OK yes... we sometimes put stuff on top of the kitchen cupboards where we knew he couldn't reach, and then would have a good giggle when we were sitting in the living room and could hear the muffled sigh and swearing then him dragging a chair across the kitchen to climb up.

But c'mon that is FUNNY .

[ChristmasNeeve]

Originally Posted by Redway

Yeah but to a lot of people a strong 5"10 is 6-foot. I'm not saying that all or even the vast majority of young women are desperate to have a guy that's the devil's number in feet-height (6) but surely you do sort of know that a lot of people get hung up on it in a shallow way that goes beyond just having certain preferences (which is fine). But I'm not talking about all or even the vast majority of ones. Just the ones who are noisy about their height preferences (which when they're so exaggerated and not exactly based on anything that's true do strike me as shallow).

And 5"8 is just enough. I'm definitely not arguing against that. That's essentially what I'm saying, even.

5'8" is just enough for what? Now you're the one who sounds shallow about men's height

[ChristmasNeeve]

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy

Redway what if I'm 6'2, well built, rock a beard AND have a deep voice? Prime beef and still TiBB's biggest feminist

In all seriousness though, I've always been tall and in MY experience, it's men themselves who have issues regarding their height/other men's height -- not women. The same goes for being "ripped". I think on a genuine psychological level, most people who are attracted to men/masculine features like some size/muscle BUT the over-the-top muscle definition is 100% to impress other blokes ... vast majority of women are not that fussed or even dislike it.

But isn't that usually the way, and that's not just men, women too are often the harshest critics of their own/other women's bodies and notice things as negatives that men don't actually care about at all.

It's all just socialisation none of it particularly comes into the real psychology of attraction at all.

Also -- a lot of it is what people prefer when looking at people on a screen. Massive under-estimation of the effects of both personality and, as we are all just animals at the end of the day, pheromones when it comes to real world attraction.

Great post and spot on. I have a "type" when it comes to which celebrities I find attractive, not so much in real life because as you pointed out there's much more involved in being really attracted to a person than just what they look like. I would say what I found most attractive in Gavin when I met him was his confidence and sense of humour (and his arms )

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

5'8" is just enough for what? Now you're the one who sounds shallow about men's height

To be a man!

My father in law is only 5'6 ... I don't think it's ever bothered him that much until recently, MiL and my wife are the same height, her sister is only 5'1 ... my eldest daughter recently overtook her mum and is thus now taller than her grandad aged 14 (and by a decent margin now, she just hit 5'8). I think he does find that a little confronting .

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Great post and spot on. I have a "type" when it comes to which celebrities I find attractive, not so much in real life because as you pointed out there's much more involved in being really attracted to a person than just what they look like. I would say what I found most attractive in Gavin when I met him was his confidence and sense of humour (and his arms )

It drives my wife mad when I say I don't have celebs that I find attractive, she thinks I'm being coy/not telling the truth . I'm like "I can tell you which characters in films I find attractive but I wouldn't necessarily find the same actor attractive in a different role..."

Seems to be very little to do with looks. Not zero obviously. But that bit past "objectively aesthetically pleasing person".

[Time to Sleigh]

All the time!

[ChristmasNeeve]

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy

It drives my wife mad when I say I don't have celebs that I find attractive, she thinks I'm being coy/not telling the truth . I'm like "I can tell you which characters in films I find attractive but I wouldn't necessarily find the same actor attractive in a different role..."

Seems to be very little to do with looks. Not zero obviously. But that bit past "objectively aesthetically pleasing person".

Actually a good example of that is Cillian Murphy (not for me but I've heard loads of people say this about him) That they don't fancy Cillian Murphy but they fancy Thomas Shelby (Cillian Murphys character in Peaky Blinders in case anyone hasn't watched that and if you haven't you're missing out!)

[Urban Cragou]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

5'8" is just enough for what? Now you're the one who sounds shallow about men's height

"Just enough" as in more-or-less a perfect medium for a man. That's what I meant.

[Urban Cragou]

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy

Redway what if I'm 6'2, well built, rock a beard AND have a deep voice? Prime beef and still TiBB's biggest feminist

In all seriousness though, I've always been tall and in MY experience, it's men themselves who have issues regarding their height/other men's height -- not women. The same goes for being "ripped". I think on a genuine psychological level, most people who are attracted to men/masculine features like some size/muscle BUT the over-the-top muscle definition is 100% to impress other blokes ... vast majority of women are not that fussed or even dislike it.

But isn't that usually the way, and that's not just men, women too are often the harshest critics of their own/other women's bodies and notice things as negatives that men don't actually care about at all.

It's all just socialisation none of it particularly comes into the real psychology of attraction at all.

Also -- a lot of it is what people prefer when looking at people on a screen. Massive under-estimation of the effects of both personality and, as we are all just animals at the end of the day, pheromones when it comes to real world attraction.

B.I.B.: an anomaly.

A lot of young woman have been sucked into the toxicity of this business of guys/men being extra-tall just to that the "6"4" some guys write on their Insta. bio's (using Instagram like it's Tinder or Fabswingers, I.M.O., is just the height of vapid shallowness but that's a different story altogether so let's not get into that, eh?) is extra-warranted.

O.T.T. muscle is just nasty but that's just my opinion. I know some guys/young men (and when I say young I suppose I mean anyone under t'age of, sort of, 35/40) channel some of their internal baggage into sports/working out and just throw themselves in the gym/football but people who are all-sport (unless it's athletics) and zero personality besides what they've constructed for themselves on the basis of footie this, hench that are some of the most vapid and boring people going, let me tell you.

[Urban Cragou]

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy

To be a man!

My father in law is only 5'6 ... I don't think it's ever bothered him that much until recently, MiL and my wife are the same height, her sister is only 5'1 ... my eldest daughter recently overtook her mum and is thus now taller than her grandad aged 14 (and by a decent margin now, she just hit 5'8). I think he does find that a little confronting .

The way I look at it is that women on-average tend to have longer hair for similar biological reasons that men on-average are taller than woman but that doesn't stop men with long hair from looking seriously cool a lot of the time (and men, including probably Jesus from all depictions of him over the millennia, have been known to grow their hair out for thousands of years and plait it up in all sorts of ways so it's not such a rare thing historically anyhow). Likewise I find taller women (5"7 - 5"9) quite attractive. I know women have the benefit of high-heels (which ironically were originally men's apparel) to tower over a lot of people if they're already anything from 5"6 plus (and a 5"11 woman who often wears heels - like one of my aunties - is going to look very tall indeed) but getting intimidated and feeling emasculated because of a tall woman is just pathetic and insecure.