[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by ~Kerry~

If you didn't have children I mean. If you'd not had your own children beforehand and were planning to adopt. Would you consider a Downs child?

No I don't think so

[LemonJam]

Originally Posted by ~Kerry~

To turn the subject on it's head a little, how many of you who said you wouldn't terminate would adopt or offer a child with Downs a home?

If myself and my partner weren't able to concieve a child and she had the wish to adopt then very possibly, yes.

[Tom4784]

Originally Posted by ~Kerry~

To turn the subject on it's head a little, how many of you who said you wouldn't terminate would adopt or offer a child with Downs a home?

I don't think I could look after any children that well, nevermind one that would require extra care. Maybe if I grew more confident in the future then yes but I'd leave it to the families that could give the kids a better life.

[Tom]

Originally Posted by NingleBells

No, I dont think that I could ever have an abortion and alot of downs syndrome children have a good quality of life

I think thats just a myth

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Tom

I think thats just a myth

what is? that downs syndrome kids can have a good quality of life? It completely depends on the severity of it but the way they are is their normality. I know plenty of downs syndrome people who are capable of doing plenty on their own and are very happy people.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by NingleBells

what is? that downs syndrome kids can have a good quality of life? It completely depends on the severity of it but the way they are is their normality. I know plenty of downs syndrome people who are capable of doing plenty on their own and are very happy people.

Thats true, as with lots of disabilities, people can still live a happy and fulfilling life within their restriction, whatever they are. But we are talking about people that 'are' as opposed to terminating a pregnancy. Imo there are so many thing to be factored in but it seems to be a pro/anti termination thing, regardless of whether it is a disabled child or not. Perhaps if the tests where not available and therefore the parents would not know until the child was born then they would (hopefully) cope and be the sort of parent the child needs - in an ideal world. I mean we all think we wouldn't be able to cope with lots of things, then they happen to us and we do cope. As I said before I spoke to someone who has a DS daughter and she didn't know beforehand so she had her daughter and is a brilliant parent - but had she known she would have terminated. This is a really interesting topic

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Tinseltoes

Thats true, as with lots of disabilities, people can still live a happy and fulfilling life within their restriction, whatever they are. But we are talking about people that 'are' as opposed to terminating a pregnancy. Imo there are so many thing to be factored in but it seems to be a pro/anti termination thing, regardless of whether it is a disabled child or not. Perhaps if the tests where not available and therefore the parents would not know until the child was born then they would (hopefully) cope and be the sort of parent the child needs - in an ideal world. I mean we all think we wouldn't be able to cope with lots of things, then they happen to us and we do cope. As I said before I spoke to someone who has a DS daughter and she didn't know beforehand so she had her daughter and is a brilliant parent - but had she known she would have terminated. This is a really interesting topic

I understand that and I can only go on what I think I might do in the situation, I have never been so I couldn't say with 100% certainty though I am as sure as I can be that I wouldn't be able to do it.

[fruit_cake]

The only thing I can say in the favour of people who choose to murder their own children, is that if they are going to be the parents, perhaps the kid really is better of dead.

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

[Kerry]

Originally Posted by Scott

Do you just sit around giggling?

[Novo]

Originally Posted by Scott

[Kerry]

Contagious giggles...

PS Novo if you're expecting a reply to the wall message yours is blocked to me so I can't

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

ya mostly

[Kerry]

Originally Posted by Scott

ya mostly

lol well, glad you're happy

[Kerry]

I know of a family who adopted three Downs children. Must be exhausting yet rewarding.

[Novo]

That was Basil's friend

[Kerry]

Originally Posted by Novo

That was Basil's friend

Lassie

[AJ.]

Originally Posted by CranberryJam

On the basis that it had a disability, absolutley not. I'm really quite suprised at the amount of people who would to be honest. It's kindof sickening IMO that people are like "hmm, it's not quite right, bin it" like they're a snickers bar missing the caramel (apologies for the obscure anaolgy) Parents can still embrace the joy they have with a child with a disability as they could with a non-disabled child.

I dunno, I grew up around children with disabilities so maybe I'm more biased.

Agree with this & me to.

A friend of mine's parents was told that he would be downs but he turned out to be perfectly normal. What if your parents was told a similar thing & they decided to abort you? That's besides the point though, most disabled kids can enjoy life just as much as us & I think it might be a bit selfish to just assume otherwise, if you don't want the responsibility you can always just put them up for adoption.

[fruit_cake]

abortion = murder as far as I'm concerned.

I hope one day when the abortion madness finishes, they retrospectively round up everyone involved and charge them for crimes against humanity.

[Jessica.]

I would never consider murdering a helpless young child just because I happened to give it an extra chromosome which lead to him/her having such a condition.

[Ammi]

This topic is a bit confusing because it seems to be going down the route of pro/anti termination but surely the OP is being more specific than that and posing the question of the child being downs syndrome and whether that affects peoples views. Tbh I think its hard for anyone to know for sure unless they're in that situation so views are generally based on whether they are pro or anti termination. I know a young down syndrome girl and I also know that her mother did not know before she was born that she would be DS, so I asked her whether she thinks, she would have still had her. She said even though she adores her daughter, weighing up everything (the father abandoned them, her daughter has had over 20 surgeries already and she is only 5) if she had actually known the reailities of coping with a severely(and she is more severe downs syndrome) disabled child she would not have had her if she had known beforehand. This might seem like a callous thing to say in some peoples view, but it is based on personal experience and she feels how she feels. Its good to think we would all do 'the right thing' and be amazing, caring, compassionate parents and give our child as high a quality of life as possible, but some of us wouldn't and couldn't cope and its that simple.

[Miss Ivy Balls]

How about, all the people who wouldn't accept a down syndrome child to not bother having a child in the first place, unless due to an accident such as the condom splitting or something of a similar sort.

Put something on the end of it and don't bother looking to make children if this is your view.

Fair point?

[ElProximo]

Originally Posted by ~Kerry~

Prompted by an Emmerdale storyline - If you found out you were pregnant with a baby with Downs Syndrome, would you terminate the pregnancy?
Males - Would you want your partner to terminate the pregnancy?

I have thought about this scenario. The retarded kid thing. I can't imagine killing the baby but I would like to find out what options are available in having someone else raise the kid. Not saying those old world mental hospitals but there must be something dignified out there?
Like a seniors care or we call them 'group homes' where nurses and social workers raise them almost like a family together.

but no, of course I can't imagine killing the kid.

Thats true, as with lots of disabilities, people can still live a happy and fulfilling life within their restriction,

One day I was saying (about the retarded kid) that I felt so bad for him and how his life must suck. Then someone (non-tarded) said 'They are happier than we are".
It made sense when you watched how damn happy they were to get some hamburgers. I mean, for them, life is always 'in the moment'.
All they know is this hamburger is just great. They are never thinking about the cost, they don't feel guilty about their weight, they are not watching a clock because they got something pressing their schedule.
They just enjoy the ****in hamburger in that moment and only that.
And when they are done they go are enjoying the next thing. Some shiny objects. And they are only in that moment.
EVEN IF they get angry because another one took the shiny paper? It's pure and simple. Then its over. They are not up at night trying to find out why Howard the retarded paper-remover is out to get them. They don't grind teeth vowing to teach Howard a lesson next time.
They don't go to doctors for benzos, prozacs or anxiety medications.
None of them ever became depressed because they agonize over their 'specialness' and what the meaning of life is.
Truth is - we wish we could do that.

My problem is that I have no idea how to communicate with these people. Sure, they do make me laugh sometimes but I just don't know how I could raise one.
I actually admire people that can. I just can't imagine pulling that off.

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

this reminded me of that silent scream video thing you watch in school

did anybody else see that where it shows an abortion like a scan and you can you the abortion happening and you can see the baby open its mouth likes its screaming

its the saddest thing i have ever seen

[Niall]

Originally Posted by Scott

this reminded me of that silent scream video thing you watch in school

did anybody else see that where it shows an abortion like a scan and you can you the abortion happening and you can see the baby open its mouth likes its screaming

its the saddest thing i have ever seen

Nope.

That sounds fucked up O_o