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Kerry · 14-10-2010, 03:36 AM

I know we have a majority of younger members here but a general question - Do you want to get married? Do you dream of weddings? I'd love to hear from both male and females of all ages

When I was younger I used to crave it. Not the wedding (I HATE attention) but the general marriage yet now it doesn't fuss me one way or the other

Views.....

Stephanie · 14-10-2010, 03:45 AM

not sure really, depends if i meet the right person or not. i don't dream about marriage or anything though like some people i know who have like planned their weddings already and stuff. i guess it would be nice being married to someone and all that, but then like a lot of people get divorced and stuff nowadays so idk, it's off putting.

Vicky. · 14-10-2010, 03:50 AM

Not really. I am not religious, so I just see it as a piece of paper and an expensive party to be honest.

I would do it, but its not something I would go out of my way to do...if that makes sense :/

Kerry · 14-10-2010, 03:56 AM

Think thats the same here. I'd do it but I'm not religious so it'd be a civil ceremony.

I've been with my OH for over 16 years at it is. I think he'd like a ceremony to get rid.....

Vicky. · 14-10-2010, 04:05 AM

Haha.

Gavin wants to get married...I said I would but no churches/dresses/any of that crap.

Its hard for me to understand though, as hes not religious either. Its not about pleasing parents as neither mine or his would be too bothered by it...but mind, it is a brilliant excuse for a nice holiday

Kerry · 14-10-2010, 04:09 AM

If I ever got married I'd piddle off somewhere and tell the family/friends later. I hate fuss

Niamh. · 14-10-2010, 10:55 AM

Well, I'm not religious at all but I don't look at marriage in a religious sense more like the ultimate commitment to your partner. That's just my view on it though I don't think people should get married if it's not for them. I take it very seriously, there is no way I would have gotten married if I wasn't as sure as I possibly could be about it and I was with my husband.

Iceman · 14-10-2010, 11:09 AM

Funny story, I was gonna get married last year for the hell of it, me and my GF at the time were gonna go to a registry office and do it. Literally meant nothing to either of us so we thought we may aswell. Then we thought how it could affect our families and decided against it...

Although I'd never say NO to marriage it's just not a high priority in terms of how I see my life panning out.

Niamh. · 14-10-2010, 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iceman

Funny story, I was gonna get married last year for the hell of it, me and my GF at the time were gonna go to a registry office and do it. Literally meant nothing to either of us so we thought we may aswell. Then we thought how it could affect our families and decided against it...

Although I'd never say NO to marriage it's just not a high priority in terms of how I see my life panning out.

and besides the affect it would have on your families you'd have to think about the legal implications too, it's a binding contract that you'd have to get out of if you decided to split up!

Iceman · 14-10-2010, 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamhxo

and besides the affect it would have on your families you'd have to think about the legal implications too, it's a binding contract that you'd have to get out of if you decided to split up!

That was another reason at the time aswell, it was an idea we toyed with for a month or two..... (luckily it didnt happen and as it turned out she was a slut.)

Niamh. · 14-10-2010, 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iceman

That was another reason at the time aswell, it was an idea we toyed with for a month or two..... (luckily it didnt happen and as it turned out she was a slut.)

setanta · 14-10-2010, 12:17 PM

I don't attend mass myself and, as I have never felt the appropriate kind of love that's necessary for a step like this, I suppose I'm not qualified really to answer, but yeah, I must say that if or when there comes a time that I find a girl who I couldn't even begin to imagine living without I wouldn't hesitate in the slightest. I suppose I'm an old romantic at heart underneath all the cynicism but yeah, there's something very touching about giving oneself entirely to another, body and soul. But yeah, then there's another part of me that questions if that actually happens with couples: if that love exists because let's be honest, most people marry out of fear. I'll get killed for that!

lostalex · 14-10-2010, 12:22 PM

Marriage itself doesn't matter to me, because i'm not married. However the fact that i am not legally allowed to marry does affect me, because it means all citizens do not have equal rights.

So being discriminated against, i'm sure does affect all gay people in the US and UK who do not enjoy the same rights as heterosexual people.

I've certainly dreamed about my wedding day, imagined what i'll wear, thought about which family members would show up, which would not. Imagined the playlist of songs at the reception. It is fun to think about.

Marriage is a legal institution, not a religious institution.

Kazanne · 14-10-2010, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iceman

That was another reason at the time aswell, it was an idea we toyed with for a month or two..... (luckily it didnt happen and as it turned out she was a slut.)

Sunday · 14-10-2010, 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamhxo

Well, I'm not religious at all but I don't look at marriage in a religious sense more like the ultimate commitment to your partner. That's just my view on it though I don't think people should get married if it's not for them. I take it very seriously, there is no way I would have gotten married if I wasn't as sure as I possibly could be about it and I was with my husband.

Agree with this, Marriage should be taken seriously or dont get married.

arista · 14-10-2010, 01:34 PM

Male Churches into Disco's

Patrick · 14-10-2010, 02:02 PM

Meh,

Like I have had dreams like just one or two about getting married to a girl in my school when we're older but like that was just a phase.

I don't know tbh, I'm not really bothered.

And all the Sex before Marriage things would be hell so I wouldn't follow that, I would probably end up killing my mum or something because she'd want to interfere just as alot of mums do.

I'd hate paying for it, I like my money you see.

And I'd hate listening to my girlfriend banging on about it for months to the point where I'd ******ing lock her out of the house.

But the honey moon and the party would be wicked.

I'd want to get married before I have a kid, I'd hate to have a kid and then get married because it'd just be too stressful.

Go out for about over 6 years, Get married, Have a child about 3 years later.

MTVN · 14-10-2010, 02:22 PM

Nah, not that bothered about it. Never really seen the appeal or why it is considered necessary tbh. Not saying I want to spend my whole life a bachelor but I'd happily settle down with someone without marrying them. A couple who my parents are friends with aren't married but have been together for 30 years, never feeling the need to be wed.

I probably would get married for the right person, though I have no ore-planned intention to do so. It's the same with kids. At this point in my life I'd say that I never really want children, that may change when I'm older though.

Beastie · 14-10-2010, 02:31 PM

Are you married Kerry?

I think maybe when I was younger I wanted to get married.
To be honest.. it sounds too much pressure.
I am still with my boyfriend after a long time.. but I would want us to get a nest together before getting married.
A part of me thinks.. maybe we might as well have kids first before marriage?

Anyway.. I would like to get married.. BUT.. I just get paranoid.. Lots of marriages are breaking down. I need to KNOW that the man is the right one for me. Suppose you won't know will you? I don't want to ever end up getting a divorce but like.. If I end up "unhappy" in a marriage I don't want to be "tied down" as well.. until "death do part".

Anyway.. if I do get married.. I would love a SMALL affair.
I would love it if it was just me, my husband to be and JUST both our parents at the wedding. I don't like attention. I don't want a "big deal" out of it. I would be happy to get married in a register office or something.

Marriage does sound like a lovely thing. But just not the wedding part. Mmmm.

lostalex · 14-10-2010, 02:41 PM

Patrick why are you moaning about cost? Doesn't the father of the bride usually have to pay?

That's the tradition here in America, maybe it's different in the UK. ???

MTVN · 14-10-2010, 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thebeast

Are you married Kerry?

I think maybe when I was younger I wanted to get married.
To be honest.. it sounds too much pressure.
I am still with my boyfriend after a long time.. but I would want us to get a nest together before getting married.
A part of me thinks.. maybe we might as well have kids first before marriage?

Anyway.. I would like to get married.. BUT.. I just get paranoid.. Lots of marriages are breaking down. I need to KNOW that the man is the right one for me. Suppose you won't know will you? I don't want to ever end up getting a divorce but like.. If I end up "unhappy" in a marriage I don't want to be "tied down" as well.. until "death do part".

Anyway.. if I do get married.. I would love a SMALL affair.
I would love it if it was just me, my husband to be and JUST both our parents at the wedding. I don't like attention. I don't want a "big deal" out of it. I would be happy to get married in a register office or something.

Marriage does sound like a lovely thing. But just not the wedding part. Mmmm.

I thought you were saying you'd love to cheat on your husband at first

Beastie · 14-10-2010, 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN

I thought you were saying you'd love to cheat on your husband at first

Lol!

Beastie · 14-10-2010, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

Patrick why are you moaning about cost? Doesn't the father of the bride usually have to pay?

That's the tradition here in America, maybe it's different in the UK. ???

Yeah.. I remember hearing that tradition here too.

I don't think it works like that anymore.

Vicky. · 14-10-2010, 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

Patrick why are you moaning about cost? Doesn't the father of the bride usually have to pay?

That's the tradition here in America, maybe it's different in the UK. ???

Most people pay for their own.

As they should tbh...why should the brides father get stuck paying for a huge p*** up for everyone?