[MTVN]

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy

Bit of a dual answer here. If something is said in confidence then I will keep it that way - with the caveat of understanding that if you tell me something, you are telling both me and my wife that thing. We talk about literally everything. Essentially it's not just that I might tell her, I 100% definitely will tell her, and vice versa. However for both of us, it will go no further than that.

I think that should generally be assumed of most long term/married couples, though.

I understand why this happens but it does make me a bit cautious about what I'd tell my married friends

Had a situation before where something has happened you wouldn't want talked about, guy tells his wife 'in confidence', she tells her best friend 'in confidence', her friend tells her parents 'in confidence' and before you know it it's all over the place!

[rusticgal]

Originally Posted by MTVN

I understand why this happens but it does make me a bit cautious about what I'd tell my married friends

Had a situation before where something has happened you wouldn't want talked about, guy tells his wife 'in confidence', she tells her best friend 'in confidence', her friend tells her parents 'in confidence' and before you know it it's all over the place!

That’s so true…

[user104658]

Originally Posted by MTVN

I understand why this happens but it does make me a bit cautious about what I'd tell my married friends

Had a situation before where something has happened you wouldn't want talked about, guy tells his wife 'in confidence', she tells her best friend 'in confidence', her friend tells her parents 'in confidence' and before you know it it's all over the place!

To be fair, I wouldn't tell my wife those things (and vice versa) if I wasn't 100% certain she wouldn't share them with other people, and it's also not "non-consensual" I guess you would say, I have a small number of very close friends who are likely to confide anything massively personal and they do that knowing that they're essentially confiding in both of us. And that goes both ways too, I don't share anything with them without expecting that I'm sharing it with their partners too. We're all old men in 15+ year relationships.