[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by kizzy

Hold on a min, i've just noticed this jack... Are you suggesting your sexuality is solely based on how you were raised?
I dont agree here, and feel sexuality is predetermined from birth. I also believe asexuality is too, even if you have previously had a sex life there is little or no drive or desire as has been voiced on this thread.
It is higher on the autistic spectrum, and my thoughts are that those who believe themselves to be asexual are on the spectrum, even if only displaying slight pragmatic difficulties. This is only my view and i dont expect anyone to share it, but it would be interesting to see if anyone on here believes they maybe asexual to take an online autism spectrum test.
I dont in anyway mean to offend anyone.

Give me a link to a decent test and I'll do it.

[Ammi]

As I've said before, I know very little about asexuality. It seems to me that genetics do come into it. If I were to ask say a gay guy..'How do you know you wouldn't enjoy sex with a woman'?..he would reply that he had no sexual feelings or desires to towards ....asexuality seems the same principle to me. I believe we are born with our sexualities and if hetrosexuals and homosexuals are born with theirs...then so must an asexual. That's a very lay opinion and I'm not sure what research has been done.
..The 'Romantic Asexual' has me a little confused though because it feels more of an emotional rather than genetic thing..as if they are drawn to the romance and ideal of love...but not the sex, maybe the sex would shatter that illusion for them...I don't know...it's just a thought

[Ninastar]

Originally Posted by Ammi

As I've said before, I know very little about asexuality. It seems to me that genetics do come into it. If I were to ask say a gay guy..'How do you know you wouldn't enjoy sex with a woman'?..he would reply that he had no sexual feelings or desires to towards ....asexuality seems the same principle to me. I believe we are born with our sexualities and if hetrosexuals and homosexuals are born with theirs...then so must an asexual. That's a very lay opinion and I'm not sure what research has been done.
..The 'Romantic Asexual' has me a little confused though because it feels more of an emotional rather than genetic thing..as if they are drawn to the romance and ideal of love...but not the sex, maybe the sex would shatter that illusion for them...I don't know...it's just a thought

I often wonder something along the same lines as this. Like, if we were never told what we were expected to be, how would we end up? Would everyone be asexual? I think everyone would be pansexual, which is slightly different.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Ninastar

I often wonder something along the same lines as this. Like, if we were never told what we were expected to be, how would we end up? Would everyone be asexual? I think everyone would be pansexual, which is slightly different.

..yes, I agree..there are a lot of pressure from 'moulding' and feeling we should be a certain way. I have to admit, I don't know very much about it and wouldn't like to over simplify it.....but......I know when I was younger, I was led to believe, through books and films that 'Love' and 'Romance' was an ideal that didn't actually go beyond the bedroom door...LOL. It would have spolied the illusion and tbh, I was quite frightened at the thought of sex and thought it would destroy the perfect image in my mind. I can't say it is the same for romantic asexuals because genetice must come into it...but I wonder if it is partly emotional too...not exactly a 'Peter Pan' complex but a fear of shattering a dream.

[Niamh.]

Closing this for a minute while I get rid of the offtopic comments

Autism tests and results have been moved here :

http://www.thisisbigbrother.com/foru...d.php?t=197531

[Ninastar]

Originally Posted by Ammi

..yes, I agree..there are a lot of pressure from 'moulding' and feeling we should be a certain way. I have to admit, I don't know very much about it and wouldn't like to over simplify it.....but......I know when I was younger, I was led to believe, through books and films that 'Love' and 'Romance' was an ideal that didn't actually go beyond the bedroom door...LOL. It would have spolied the illusion and tbh, I was quite frightened at the thought of sex and thought it would destroy the perfect image in my mind. I can't say it is the same for romantic asexuals because genetice must come into it...but I wonder if it is partly emotional too...not exactly a 'Peter Pan' complex but a fear of shattering a dream.

I think it's disgusting how much sex is shown on TV. I actually think it distorts younger peoples minds. I think it's the main reason of all the STD's going around. All of it should be kept behind closed doors. It's too 'out there' when really it should be kept private.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Ninastar

I think it's disgusting how much sex is shown on TV. I actually think it distorts younger peoples minds. I think it's the main reason of all the STD's going around. All of it should be kept behind closed doors. It's too 'out there' when really it should be kept private.

Peoples ideas on sexual "norms" do seem to follow what's going on in the media at the time, that's true enough.

[InOne]

Originally Posted by Ninastar

I think it's disgusting how much sex is shown on TV. I actually think it distorts younger peoples minds. I think it's the main reason of all the STD's going around. All of it should be kept behind closed doors. It's too 'out there' when really it should be kept private.

I think it would only distort a young persons mind if they were vunerable to being distorted anyway. It's up to the parents what they let them view and I think as long as there's good education about it then most will be ok. I'm in the view that upbringing doesn't affect sexuality at all. You're always going to be the sexuality you were born with.

[Ninastar]

Originally Posted by InOne

I think it would only distort a young persons mind if they were vunerable to being distorted anyway. It's up to the parents what they let them view and I think as long as there's good education about it then most will be ok. I'm in the view that upbringing doesn't affect sexuality at all. You're always going to be the sexuality you were born with.

Yeah I guess you're right, but a lot of new parents now have no idea. Just my opinion, but parenting isn't as strong as it used to be and I think it's only going to get worse.

The idea of sex that is thrown around right now is so wrong in my opinion. I think you should be exposed to it, but there is a limit and everything that is exposed now is way over that limit.

[InOne]

Originally Posted by Ninastar

Yeah I guess you're right, but a lot of new parents now have no idea. Just my opinion, but parenting isn't as strong as it used to be and I think it's only going to get worse.

The idea of sex that is thrown around right now is so wrong in my opinion. I think you should be exposed to it, but there is a limit and everything that is exposed now is way over that limit.

I do agree those parents who sit their kids infront of the TV all day and let them do whatever maybe more vunerable. Getting their sexual ideas from the TV probably isn't good. And sometimes it can be from a young age too. But as long as they don't live in a bubble then I guess they won't be too damaged, it's all about the right balance. Which sadly like you say, some parents don't give.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Ninastar

I think it's disgusting how much sex is shown on TV. I actually think it distorts younger peoples minds. I think it's the main reason of all the STD's going around. All of it should be kept behind closed doors. It's too 'out there' when really it should be kept private.

Originally Posted by InOne

I do agree those parents who sit their kids infront of the TV all day and let them do whatever maybe more vunerable. Getting their sexual ideas from the TV probably isn't good. And sometimes it can be from a young age too. But as long as they don't live in a bubble then I guess they won't be too damaged, it's all about the right balance. Which sadly like you say, some parents don't give.

I think sex has always been 'out there' to some extent...maybe not so much on TV, but in other ways. And it is a parent's responsibility to inform as much balance as they possibly can but they're not necessarily the one's their child would want any views from....after a certain age...if at all.
...I still think, with all the information from all the different sources...people will still be what they will be...I think that's basic nature
I think asexuality must be genetic...I'm just not sure whether it applies equally to 'romantic' and 'non romantic' asexuals...or why there are two types

[Ninastar]

Originally Posted by InOne

I do agree those parents who sit their kids infront of the TV all day and let them do whatever maybe more vunerable. Getting their sexual ideas from the TV probably isn't good. And sometimes it can be from a young age too. But as long as they don't live in a bubble then I guess they won't be too damaged, it's all about the right balance. Which sadly like you say, some parents don't give.

Yep I agree. Sadly it's becoming more common for this to happen though.

[lostalex]

I think the idea of Asexuaity is interesting. I personally don't like labels on sexuality, i think sexuality is very fluid.

Homosexuality means you prefer sex with men, but i certainly don't want to have sex with all men or even most men, i'd say less than 1% of men i'd actually want to have sex with, so am i really homosexual? same for heterosexuals, or bisexuals, also there are all the "fetishes" feet, or bondage, or armpits, or furry. rough and violent, or soft and loving. There are so many variations and you're preference can change from day to day.

I've definitely been through periods of my life where the absolute last thing i'd ever want to do is have sex. Did that make me "asexual" during those times?

I think sexuality is very misunderstood, and in trying to understand it we try to create labels and groups and segregations. I don't think that's a particularly helpful or intelligent approach.

[Ninastar]

I think that you can fall in love with anyone, no matter their gender. I don't believe anyone is straight and I don't believe anyone is gay. I think that all these labels make it so much more complicated than it is. I wish everyone was pansexual, because there would be alot less hate imo.

[Niall]

I feel like I'm the only one who has no trouble comprehending this one. I mean its fascinating sure, but if there are gay people, straight people, bi people and those that feel they should be the opposite gender, then we should have seen this one coming if you catch my drift? I don't get the shock and stigma around it. In fact, it would seem to me that this is the most (and I don't meant the following word in a derogatory sense) 'harmless' of sexualities.

I just think its more prevalent now because people are becoming more comfortable with expressing their sexual identity. Same thing with gays/bi/trans people.

It should get more media coverage and publicity though. It must be so hard for someone to progress through their teenage years and feel nothing towards anyone. The rarity of it must add to that too. :/

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by lostalex

I think the idea of Asexuaity is interesting. I personally don't like labels on sexuality, i think sexuality is very fluid.

Homosexuality means you prefer sex with men, but i certainly don't want to have sex with all men or even most men, i'd say less than 1% of men i'd actually want to have sex with, so am i really homosexual? same for heterosexuals, or bisexuals, also there are all the "fetishes" feet, or bondage, or armpits, or furry. rough and violent, or soft and loving. There are so many variations and you're preference can change from day to day.

I've definitely been through periods of my life where the absolute last thing i'd ever want to do is have sex. Did that make me "asexual" during those times?

I think sexuality is very misunderstood, and in trying to understand it we try to create labels and groups and segregations. I don't think that's a particularly helpful or intelligent approach.

That's a great post Alex, definitely something to think about

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Ninastar

I think that you can fall in love with anyone, no matter their gender. I don't believe anyone is straight and I don't believe anyone is gay. I think that all these labels make it so much more complicated than it is. I wish everyone was pansexual, because there would be alot less hate imo.

Is pansexual that you're attracted to the person rather than the sex of that person?

[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Is pansexual that you're attracted to the person rather than the sex of that person?

I have no idea. Why does everything nowadays have a label?

[thesheriff443]

i see there are a lot of would be shrinks!,we have many traits that make up our personalities,as we get older these may grow stronger or weaker,many aspects of life can influence who we are!,just as different music can chang our moods,

all i ask is that you keep an open mind!!!

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by ukturtle

I have no idea. Why does everything nowadays have a label?

-googles-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pansexuality

Is that not the same as being Bisexual though?

[lostalex]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Is pansexual that you're attracted to the person rather than the sex of that person?

i think it means yur attracted to goats...

hello Mr Thomas!

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by lostalex

I think the idea of Asexuaity is interesting. I personally don't like labels on sexuality, i think sexuality is very fluid.

Homosexuality means you prefer sex with men, but i certainly don't want to have sex with all men or even most men, i'd say less than 1% of men i'd actually want to have sex with, so am i really homosexual? same for heterosexuals, or bisexuals, also there are all the "fetishes" feet, or bondage, or armpits, or furry. rough and violent, or soft and loving. There are so many variations and you're preference can change from day to day.

I've definitely been through periods of my life where the absolute last thing i'd ever want to do is have sex. Did that make me "asexual" during those times?

I think sexuality is very misunderstood, and in trying to understand it we try to create labels and groups and segregations. I don't think that's a particularly helpful or intelligent approach.

If you have sex drive and a desire for sex you are not asexual.
If you want to have sex with males only, and you are male, you are homosexual.
Different things can turn you on or off, and a healthy adult labido fluctuates at times, it does not make you asexual.
Labels can help sometimes, for instance if a young man questions why he sometimes masturbates, feels attracted but not sexually aroused by women and wants affection but not penetrative sex he can say im asexual. The thought that he is crazy or strange is then removed, its not so much labelling but understanding there are more diverse people sexually.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by lostalex

i think it means yur attracted to goats...

Or .........

Spoiler:

[lostalex]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Or .........

Spoiler:

mmm, "non-stick" i'll take that as a challenge

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by lostalex

mmm, "non-stick" i'll take that as a challenge