[DemolitionRed]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

Yup. People don't seem to get that consent can be withdrawn at any stage in the encounter. Even if someone decides halfway through that they don't want to do it. If the other keeps going after the no...or puts pressure on the person who said no, then it is rape.

In this case though it does seem like it wasn't actually rape. But I am unwilling to be naming the person accusing of being a liar without knowing the actual details of the case. The police MUST have thought there was reason to prosecute. Given they tend to disregard rape cases pretty easily. Yes, they should have looked through these messages (and if she really did send 40k messages then I would say she has a mental illness tbh) and they really messed up there. But there must have been some actual reason why they did think it was rape. he said, she said is not good enough to secure a prosecution, unless its a historical case where no actual evidence would be there realistically, which this wasn't. They just don't push ahead with prosecutions with no chance of success.

Like you say, at this point, all any of us can do I speculate.

She said she wanted rough sex. How rough is rough? perhaps she was a masochist and had fantasies of bruises and bites. Perhaps she really did want him to hurt her and the thought of that excited them both? If she was roughed up in a consensual or a none consensual act, then she likely still had evidence of bruises when she went to the police.

Who would you believe?

This could turn out to be a couple of sadomasochists with a long paper trail of past sadomasochistic activity.