[Abra]

Originally Posted by vesavius

Not a fan of her but hardly the crime of the century.

Hardly 'homophobic'

Using the word "gay" in the place of saying something is bad or negative is definitely homophobic, lmao. It's just that it's been normalised and some people simply don't care. Try that with any other minority group and see what the reaction would be.

I'm not saying she's a deliberately homophobic person, but it definitely feels like a bit of a Freudian slip, and it's honestly such an outdated phrase that she's literally made herself look like a 14 year old boy in the year 2008. More than anything, she's just a ****ing dumbass for saying that in the Big Brother house of all places, AND in front of a gay housemate.

[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by Abra

Using the word "gay" in the place of saying something is bad or negative is definitely homophobic, lmao. It's just that it's been normalised and some people simply don't care. Try that with any other minority group and see what the reaction would be.

I'm not saying she's a deliberately homophobic person, but it definitely feels like a bit of a Freudian slip, and it's honestly such an outdated phrase that she's literally made herself look like a 14 year old boy in the year 2008. More than anything, she's just a ****ing dumbass for saying that in the Big Brother house of all places, AND in front of a gay housemate.

I can’t speak for all gay guys, but it really doesn’t offend me.

[Abra]

Originally Posted by Benjamin

I can’t speak for all gay guys, but it really doesn’t offend me.

That's not really the point though. It doesn't offend me because I don't value her opinion and I'm too secure to be offended by something like that.

BUT, you can still call out the fact of her words being homophobic without being personally offended. She still used the word "gay" as a pejorative, and given the fact she's a forty year old woman, it says a lot about her character. And alas, we've already got people jumping on the bandwagon to say that using "gay" as a negative slur isn't homophobic, which is laughable and only helps to further weaponise gay people as "snowflakes" for caring about homophobic language and stoke the rampant culture wars we are seeing at the moment, thanks to a supposed harmless comment from her.

It's fine for someone to say that it doesn't offend them, or that they simply don't care, that's their prerogative, but the mental gymnastics to pretend like it's not homophobic are ridiculous. Is it equal to an egregious act of homophobia or a hate crime? No. But it's still homophobic and language matters.

[vesavius]

Originally Posted by Abra

Using the word "gay" in the place of saying something is bad or negative is definitely homophobic, lmao.

That's your opinion. I tend to not be so trigger hair upset by the use of words. Context and intent matter to me.

Originally Posted by Abra

I'm not saying she's a deliberately homophobic person, but it definitely feels like a bit of a Freudian slip

To you. Not to me.

There has been nothing that she has said or done that suggests that she has any dislike or hate toward gay people.

Calling people homophobes based on the use of a single unapproved word just feels so 2016 Tumblr. I thought that we had moved past that cringe.

[Abra]

Originally Posted by vesavius

That's your opinion. I tend to not be so trigger hair upset by the use of words. Context and intent matter to me.



To you. Not to me.

There has been nothing that she has said or done that suggests that she has any dislike or hate toward gay people.

Calling people homophobes based on the use of a single unapproved word just feels so 2016 Tumblr. I thought that we had moved past that cringe.

Sorry but no amount of mental gymnastics will stop "gay" being used as a negative term being homophobic. Whether that bothers you or not is entirely up to you, that doesn't change the fact it's homophobic. You don't have to be a pick me to feel like you're above "2016 Tumblr".

[vesavius]

Originally Posted by Abra

Sorry but no amount of mental gymnastics will stop "gay" being used as a negative term being homophobic. Whether that bothers you or not is entirely up to you, that doesn't change the fact it's homophobic. You don't have to be a pick me to feel like you're above "2016 Tumblr".

It's not 'mental gymnastics' lol, it's just me saying that context and intent matter and that words on their own are not 'problematic' to me.

it isn't a fact on your part, btw, it's a subjective opinion.

I don't understand what you mean by a 'pick me' in this context. Please explain?

[Glenn.]

Originally Posted by vesavius

It's not 'mental gymnastics' lol, it's just me saying that context and intent matter and that words on their own are not 'problematic' to me.

it isn't a fact on your part, btw, it's a subjective opinion.

I don't understand what you mean by a 'pick me' in this context. Please explain?

Her intent was to describe people in a negative way and chose to use the word gay to do that. That’s your context. Using the term gay in a negative way to insult people is homophobic no matter how you want to wrap it up.

[vesavius]

Originally Posted by Glenn.

Her intent was to describe people in a negative way and chose to use the word gay to do that. That’s your context. Using the term gay in a negative way to insult people is homophobic no matter how you want to wrap it up.

There is no way to say that... You don't know what's inside her head or her intent.

Was her intent to harm or hurt or show hate or dislike towards gay people? I see no evidence of that. In fact, it would feel directly against the attitudes she has shown up to now.

I have seen no evidence of her disliking or hating gays and a single word used like that is not enough to condemn her. And I say all this not even liking her.

Those types of labels are weaponised and used far too easily, IMO, often with full knowledge of the damage they can do. It's just a game that I do not play.

[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by Glenn.

Her intent was to describe people in a negative way and chose to use the word gay to do that. That’s your context. Using the term gay in a negative way to insult people is homophobic no matter how you want to wrap it up.

That’s your opinion though. I don’t find it homophobic as it wasn’t being used in that context.

[Abra]

Originally Posted by vesavius

It's not 'mental gymnastics' lol, it's just me saying that context and intent matter and that words on their own are not 'problematic' to me.

it isn't a fact on your part, btw, it's a subjective opinion.

I don't understand what you mean by a 'pick me' in this context. Please explain?

Yeah... and the context was that Kerry used the word "gay" as an adjective to describe something negative that she didn't like. Homophobia doesn't have to be directed towards a specific person or a specific group of people, or be coming from a particular place of bigotry to be homophobia. By your own logic, someone using "black" or a racial term to describe something negative wouldn't be racism. Even with the context of the situation being taken into consideration, it was homophobic. It's not subjective at all. The only thing that is subjective is whether it bothers you or not, which like I said, is entirely up to you.

"Pick me" is a term that basically means somebody who acts as a contrarian.

[vesavius]

Originally Posted by Abra

Yeah... and the context was that Kerry used the word "gay" as an adjective to describe something negative that she didn't like. Homophobia doesn't have to be directed towards a specific person or a specific group of people, or be coming from a particular place of bigotry to be homophobia. By your own logic, someone using "black" or a racial term to describe something negative wouldn't be racism. Even with the context of the situation being taken into consideration, it was homophobic. It's not subjective at all. The only thing that is subjective is whether it bothers you or not, which like I said, is entirely up to you.

"Pick me" is a term that basically means somebody who acts as a contrarian.

I am not a contrarian just because I disagree with you on this. We all have our own opinions, that's the point of the forum.

Black is used all the time to describe bad things... Black magic, black sheep, etc... Using those terms would not be racist.

I am sorry, but yes, it is subjective. No one gets to set the law of the universe on these matters. No one's world view is the cosmic truth.

What homophobia DOES need to do though is to show a hatred or dislike of gay people. That's it's literal definition. I see none of that from Kerry. As I say, she has actually shown the complete opposite attitude.

Honestly, the term 'homophobe' is not well served by being so over used for tiny issues like this. It cheapens it and robs it of it's power.

[Abra]

Originally Posted by vesavius

I am not a contrarian just because I disagree with you on this. We all have our own opinions, that's the point of the forum.

Black is used all the time to describe bad things... Black magic, black sheep, etc... Using those terms would not be racist.

I am sorry, but yes, it is subjective. No one gets to set the law of the universe on these matters. No one's world view is the cosmic truth.

What homophobia DOES need to do though is to show a hatred or dislike of gay people. That's it's literal definition. I see none of that from Kerry. As I say, she has actually shown the complete opposite attitude.

Honestly, the term 'homophobe' is not well served by being so over used for tiny issues like this. It cheapens it and robs it of it's power.

I was obviously referring to black as in race, not the colour black, and I'm pretty sure you knew that, so I'm not sure why you're resorting to acting obtuse and pretending like you weren't aware of that or that it went over your head.

Your interpretation of what homophobia is or isn't is very "I have a black friend so I can't be racist", you're either incredibly naive or incredibly contrarian.

If homophobia needs to show a dislike of gay people, I would say using "gay" as an adjective to describe something you don't like is a pretty good start. Your argument simply doesn't stack up the way you think it does.

[Beso]

Originally Posted by Abra

Sorry but no amount of mental gymnastics will stop "gay" being used as a negative term being homophobic. Whether that bothers you or not is entirely up to you, that doesn't change the fact it's homophobic. You don't have to be a pick me to feel like you're above "2016 Tumblr".

How on earth do you know that gay has always been used negatively.in every single conversation and scenario across the UK.

The word dont belong to anyone, and if commonly used enough to describe something then it should be accepted., just like when gay meant being joyfully and merry, before it was stolen by the biggest grinches on the planet to mean something else, that nobody apart from the grinches could talk about.


Get over yourself darling.


Kerry's convo was a convo with friends, one where calling a friends idea gay is actually a gentle way of
shutting a stupid idea down by using a term of endearment to do so.

[Abra]

Originally Posted by parmnion

How on earth do you know that gay has always been used negatively.in every single conversation and scenario across the UK.

The word dont belong to anyone, and if commonly used enough to describe something then it should be accepted., just like when gay meant being joyfully and merry, before it was stolen by the biggest grinches on the planet to mean something else, that nobody apart from the grinches could talk about.


Get over yourself darling.


Kerry's convo was a convo with friends, one where calling a friends idea gay is actually a gentle way of
shutting a stupid idea down by using a term of endearment to do so.

Where did I say that "gay has always been used negatively in every single conversation and scenario across the UK"? It would be easier to debate with you if you weren't just making things up and we were actually debating on the same intellectual level. If you really want to act like there's a chance that Kerry's use of the word had no connotations to the internationally recognised modern definition of the word gay you're completely delusional.

"A term of endearment"

Nothing more out of touch than a straight person trying to educate a gay person on what is or isn't homophobic, when you're actually just imposing your own ignorance. Your masked slipped a bit with that "grinches" comment though, no wonder you're so eager to defend homophobia. Birds of a feather and all

[Beso]

Originally Posted by Abra

Where did I say that "gay has always been used negatively in every single conversation and scenario across the UK"? It would be easier to debate with you if you weren't just making things up and we were actually debating on the same intellectual level. If you really want to act like there's a chance that Kerry's use of the word had no connotations to the internationally recognised modern definition of the word gay you're completely delusional.

"A term of endearment"

Nothing more out of touch than a straight person trying to educate a gay person on what is or isn't homophobic, when you're actually just imposing your own ignorance. Your masked slipped a bit with that "grinches" comment though, no wonder you're so eager to defend homophobia. Birds of a feather and all

Yes, we can do without personal abuse thank you very much.

[Abra]

Originally Posted by parmnion

Yes, we can do without personal abuse thank you very much.

Then you should probably refrain from referring to gay people as "grinches", unless you are comfortable with being a hypocrite.

[Redrose]

Originally Posted by vesavius

That's your opinion. I tend to not be so triggered hair upset by the use of words. Context and intent matter to me.



To you. Not to me.

There has been nothing that she has said or done that suggests that she has any dislike or hate toward gay people.

Calling people homophobes based on the use of a single unapproved word just feels so 2016 Tumblr. I thought that we had moved past that cringe.

All straight people are the same. I've never met a decent one. Even stopped you from entering my home. Love to make the context argument. You even do it with the f-word because meatballs have the same name.

[Garfie]

Originally Posted by Abra

‘…it's honestly such an outdated phrase that she's literally made herself look like a 14 year old boy in the year 2008. More than anything, she's just a ****ing dumbass for saying that in the Big Brother house of all places, AND in front of a gay housemate.

Can’t agree with this more. It’s strange and immature expression to come out of the mouth of a 40 year old woman, who’s a middle manager for the NHS.