[Braden]

A real-life situation popped into my head last night, and I'm not sure what to make of it so I thought I'd ask for your opinions.

It's not something that has happened recently but more of a recurring scenario. I'm going to alter the story a little because it regards my two friends and their family, and I feel awkward bitching about them on here.

So, my two friends are Eastern European and I get on with them very well. They were brought to England at a very early age and celebrate their nation's traditions nonetheless, they're very proud of who they are and stay true to their Eastern European roots, which is great. However, myself and a few of my friends feel a bit intimidated by the fact that whenever we're invited round to their house the family speak in their native language.

It's not a problem as such, but a few of us feel that it's rude of them to speak in a foreign language when they can speak English perfectly well. But on the other hand I feel that criticising them for speaking their own language in their own home is narrow-minded and pretty ignorant.

Do you think what they're doing is rude?

[rubymoo]

I do think it's rude, but you're in their house so what can you do?

Seeing as you're all such good mates it's probably best to not read anything into it.

The family probably just revert to their native language as to them it's second nature, and they probably have no idea how intimidated you feel.

Europeans are different in the way that what we deem as rude they don't......the stiff upper lip and all that

[MTVN]

Nah I don't think it's rude, very common for families to use their native language when they are just communicating with each other and in their own home

[Liam-]

No it's not rude, it's their house so they can speak in their language if they want to.

[Kazanne]

I think it's rude,yes,they are in their own home ,but have invited you there so surely it would be common courtesy to speak so you could understand the conversation,afterall they could be slating you to hell.

[Jamesy]

If they can both speak fluent English then yes, it's rude.

[Niamh.]

I don't know really

[Liam-]

If you know that they and their family are traditional and stick to their roots and accept that, then i don't see how them speaking their own language rude, accept that you're in their house and they're free to do and speak whatever they want, i fail to see how that's rude

[Creggle]

Originally Posted by Kazanne

I think it's rude,yes,they are in their own home ,but have invited you there so surely it would be common courtesy to speak so you could understand the conversation,afterall they could be slating you to hell.

This pretty much, no other way about it.

[King Gizzard]

Think it's just easier for them isn't it

[Sophiee]

it's technically not rude since it's their native language and their own home but I'd probably feel that way being in that position because you're probably paranoid they're bitching about you .

[Crimson Dynamo]

coming over here stealing our jobs and eating our women

its a disgrace

[Black Dagger]

Oh I read it all wrong. I read it as if you asking them to speak English in their own home is rude and that is why I said yes </3

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

eating our women

[Marsh.]

It reminds me of when we went into a pub in Wales and a group of locals heard that we were English and deliberately started talking in Welsh. Ignorant bastards.

[rubymoo]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

It reminds me of when we went into a pub in Wales and a group of locals heard that we were English and deliberately started talking in Welsh. Ignorant bastards.

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by Kazanne

I think it's rude,yes,they are in their own home ,but have invited you there so surely it would be common courtesy to speak so you could understand the conversation,afterall they could be slating you to hell.

I agree. Of course it's rude and downright ignorant. There is no justification for talking in their own language when you don't understand it and they are fluent in English. Not only are they excluding you as a guest and isolating you, but the fact that they are doing so cannot mean anything else but that they are not being complimentary about you, or are talking about something which may offend you. If they have a need to discuss highly personal matters then surely it could wait until they're alone, or perhaps they should get out of the habit of having English guests.

Are you quite certain they are 'genuine' friends?

(Thinking about it, I think I'm going to learn Swahili in case I ever meet LT personally - then I can swear at him to my heart's content)

[Liam-]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

It reminds me of when we went into a pub in Wales and a group of locals heard that we were English and deliberately started talking in Welsh. Ignorant bastards.

Stay out of our pubs then

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by LiamPRW

Stay out of our pubs then

calm down Peggy

[Liam-]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

calm down Peggy

Does that make Morsh Pat in this scenario?

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by LiamPRW

Stay out of our pubs then

Cusanu fy ass.

[Liam-]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

Cusanu fy ass.

No, i don't know where it's been

[Marsh.]

[Jessica.]

No, it's not rude at all, they've spoken to each other in that language for their whole lives, they can probably express themselves better to each other. If I lived in a foreign country and had kids who brought a friend over, I would still talk to my kid/husband in English for general conversations, for sure.

[MTVN]

They're only gonna be talking about mundane family issues I'm sure anyway lol, I wouldn't feel particularly excluded by not knowing what they're on about