[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

You cannot have a happy marriage if you have a mistress, you may be married but happy, respect for yourself, true to yourself?

No

You would be nothing more than a shallow cad and your life a pathetic sham

Exactly and as much as I find the OP insulting towards women, it's also pretty insulting towards all those decent men out there in marriages/long term relationships.

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

You cannot have a happy marriage if you have a mistress, you may be married but happy, respect for yourself, true to yourself?

No

You would be nothing more than a shallow cad and your life a pathetic sham

[Kizzy]

The term 'mistress' is quite out moded to be applied to any modern relationship, mistresses were taken without the consent of the wife and conducted in secret.
I don't think having a long term affair could or ever would add to a marriage, the deception and the divergence of feelings for both women would be detrimental to the marriage and if discovered could end it completely.
Personally I would not like to be the mistress, should the affair last there would be the distinct risk of developing feelings for the man you are sleeping with, added to that the need for a loving family of your own where you happily provide both a happy home life and a fulfilling sex life.
There should be no question of a divergence of roles, if that were the case we could go on forever selecting mates for specific roles... I could have Mr Monday for his bedroom prowess, Mr Tuesday the electrician, Mr Wednesday the gardener...
Hang on, I'm having a rethink....jk.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

The term 'mistress' is quite out moded to be applied to any modern relationship, mistresses were taken without the consent of the wife and conducted in secret.
I don't think having a long term affair could or ever would add to a marriage, the deception and the divergence of feelings for both women would be detrimental to the marriage and if discovered could end it completely.
Personally I would not like to be the mistress, should the affair last there would be the distinct risk of developing feelings for the man you are sleeping with, added to that the need for a loving family of your own where you happily provide both a happy home life and a fulfilling sex life.
There should be no question of a divergence of roles, if that were the case we could go on forever selecting mates for specific roles... I could have Mr Monday for his bedroom prowess, Mr Tuesday the electrician, Mr Wednesday the gardener...
Hang on, I'm having a rethink....jk.

lol that's the funny part, if these mistresses ever did end up as the wife, would they be happy then for their husband to toddle off with their new Mistress while they stay at home and do the dishes?

I know I'm getting quite emotive about this subject but I have witnessed the complete and utter devastation this kind of thing causes a family, not just the couple themselves but kids and brothers and sisters etc etc it's not pretty and for someone like the OP to come along all flippantly like that and not give a **** about the trail of destruction those actions, all in the name of meaningless "fun" can cause, actually disgusts me

I spent months upon months trying to help someone very close to me pick up the pieces of their shattered life after a situation very similar to this.

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

lol that's the funny part, if these mistresses ever did end up as the wife, would they be happy then for their husband to toddle off with their new Mistress while they stay at home and do the dishes?

I know I'm getting quite emotive about this subject but I have witnessed the complete and utter devastation this kind of thing causes a family, not just the couple themselves but kids and brothers and sisters etc etc it's not pretty and for someone like the OP to come along all flippantly like that and not give a **** about the trail of destruction those actions, all in the name of meaningless "fun" can cause, actually disgusts me

I spent months upon months trying to help someone very close to me pick up the pieces of their shattered life after a situation very similar to this.

Yes me too, the notion that human emotion can be taken out of a situation like this is not realistic.

[Mystic Mock]

Tbf to Kate I don't know if she meant for it to come across the way it has done to some of the individuals on this thread, however I've also seen people that I know go through stuff like this (men and women in fact) and I wouldn't want to be some toy boy in some broken relationship between the Wife and Husband that just won't call it quits.

[Scarlett.]

This thread is... well...

[Livia]

No. I don't do sharesies... and if a man expected me to, he'd be gone.

[Kazanne]

Originally Posted by Livia

No. I don't do sharesies... and if a man expected me to, he'd be gone.

This ^

[Lostie!]

I think this sort of set-up is only acceptable if it's an agreement made by the husband and wife. If so, who are we to judge?

However, if the guy is just cheating on his wife then that's not something I can agree with at all.

[Samuel.]

Well this thread is rather horrifying

[waterhog]

Originally Posted by Kate!

A man should have a wife for the family and a mistress for pleasure.

Discuss this :

I say yes and of the two roles I'd prefer to be the mistress. I know this will be controversial

I am disgusted with what you are asking kate ? it is 100% out of the question- totally disgusting and just not right at all.

anyone who disagrees with me is as sensible as my poems.

every man and woman no's to keep everyone happy you have to have a little slap and tickle along the way so to suggest 1 mistress - well that is very low standards.

most of my pals have at least 4 but as I am in my prime I am proud to have 7


( ps if any of you out there are reading this - you no I am winding everyone up and you are the one for me. )

[Jamie89]

Originally Posted by waterhog

I am disgusted with what you are asking kate ? it is 100% out of the question- totally disgusting and just not right at all.

anyone who disagrees with me is as sensible as my poems.

every man and woman no's to keep everyone happy you have to have a little slap and tickle along the way so to suggest 1 mistress - well that is very low standards.

most of my pals have at least 4 but as I am in my prime I am proud to have 7


( ps if any of you out there are reading this - you no I am winding everyone up and you are the one for me. )

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by waterhog

I am disgusted with what you are asking kate ? it is 100% out of the question- totally disgusting and just not right at all.

anyone who disagrees with me is as sensible as my poems.

every man and woman no's to keep everyone happy you have to have a little slap and tickle along the way so to suggest 1 mistress - well that is very low standards.

most of my pals have at least 4 but as I am in my prime I am proud to have 7


( ps if any of you out there are reading this - you no I am winding everyone up and you are the one for me. )

You are a joker Hog.

[JoshBB]

Yeah... this is pretty sexist.

'A man should have a wife for the family and a mistress for pleasure' honestly is one of the most disgusting misogynistic statements I've heard in a while. Women are not products that you can choose from and they are certainly not objects to be played around with. If you want to have a polygamous relationship, I have nothing against that so long as everyone is aware that this is happening.. but honestly the whole secretive side to this seems very unfair to both the women (and the children!), and especially since one woman is essentially being used for sex.