[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by lostalex

My biological sister came out to visit for a week with her husband. it was amazing. we got along perfectly and they were both perfect houseguests. We explored the city, they loved the bay area, especially when i took them to japan town, her husband is obsessed with his car, so when i took him to japan town and he saw all stores for japanese cars he went insane. we had such a great time, my biological sister is amazing.

She even asked me to be the Godfather of her next kid. I was so flattered. We had such a good time together, we get along perfectly. we are both total geeks.

i haven't met my biological brother yet though, and he doesn't seem that interested, but he's been polite on Facebook and stuff.

Ah that's really nice for you both Alex

[lostalex]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Ah that's really nice for you both Alex

It was. I feel so lucky to have such awesome family, now i have 2 awesome families.

i was very scared when i first found them, but honestly it's all been more than i could ever have hoped for. I would encourage anyone who is adopted to not be so scared to seek out their biological family, they really are just normal people like you.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by lostalex

It was. I feel so lucky to have such awesome family, now i have 2 awesome families.

i was very scared when i first found them, but honestly it's all been more than i could ever have hoped for. I would encourage anyone who is adopted to not be so scared to seek out their biological family, they really are just normal people like you.

Actually 3 of my closest friends were adopted, 2 of them found their biological parents/siblings but 1 of them has never and says she never wants to

[lostalex]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Actually 3 of my closest friends were adopted, 2 of them found their biological parents/siblings but 1 of them has never and says she never wants to

honestly i was probably most like your 3rd friend, i never wanted to, but my brother really wanted it, and he does;t really use the internet and computers much, so i really did it for him. I honestly felt like i was betraying my mom (my adoptive mom) by doing it, especially because my adoptive mom died, but because my brother really wanted to find out, i started on the journey, and it turned out to be awesome. but it's definitely an individual choice. I'm lucky to have had an amazing adoptive family, and they will always be my REAL family to me. The ironic thing is that my brother(adoptive brother) his family has become a real disappointment to him, his biological dad is a serious asshole. so i actually got more out of it than he did.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by lostalex

honestly i was probably most like your 3rd friend, i never wanted to, but my brother really wanted it, and he does;t really use the internet and computers much, so i really did it for him. I honestly felt like i was betraying my mom (my adoptive mom) by doing it, especially because my adoptive mom died, but because my brother really wanted to find out, i started on the journey, and it turned out to be awesome. but it's definitely an individual choice. I'm lucky to have had an amazing adoptive family, and they will always be my REAL family to me.

I think she feels like her biological mother abandoned her so she doesn't want anything to do with her which I think is a little unfair considering when my friend would have been born, Ireland was totally under the catholic Churches control and a young , single girl would have had literally no other option but to give up their baby, alot of times they were taken against their will. But of course it has to be her choice. It's not that I think she should find her mother, I just think she should forgive her and understand that she probably had no other choice back then

[lostalex]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

I think she feels like her biological mother abandoned her so she doesn't want anything to do with her which I think is a little unfair considering when my friend would have been born, Ireland was totally under the catholic Churches control and a young , single girl would have had literally no other option but to give up their baby, alot of times they were taken against their will. But of course it has to be her choice. It's not that I think she should find her mother, I just think she should forgive her and understand that she probably had no other choice back then

Yea, i'm Irish Catholic too, and was adopted through a catholic charities adoption agency. There's a lot of baggage in catholic families, because of the shame of being a young unwed mother, and also they don't believe in abortion.

but really it's usually just a case a young mother wanted a better life for her child. not that she doesn't want her child, but she is just doing what she believes is best even though it is painful for her.

In my case i am grateful to my biological mom for giving me to a loving family. that's always what my parents told me, my mom really wanted me, but she made a great sacrifice to give me a better life. and it was the truth. I am grateful to both my biological mother and my adoptive parents.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by lostalex

Yea, i'm Irish Catholic too, and was adopted through a catholic charities adoption agency. There's a lot of baggage in catholic families, because of the shame of being a young unwed mother, and also they don't believe in abortion.

but really it's usually just a case a young mother wanted a better life for her child. not that she doesn't want her child, but she is just doing what she believes is best even though it is painful for her.

In my case i am grateful to my biological mom for giving me to a loving family. that's always what my parents told me, my mom really wanted me, but she made a great sacrifice to give me a better life. and it was the truth. I am grateful to both my biological mother and my adoptive parents.

Yeah I absolutely agree with that. It must be heart breaking for a mother to give her baby up for adoption and I believe there are very few women who could carry a baby in them for 9 months and not feel devastated to have to give that baby away